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𝓘'𝓶 𝓪 𝓶𝓪𝓬𝓪𝓻𝓸𝓷 𝓲𝓷 𝓪 𝓬𝓸𝓸𝓴𝓲𝓮 𝓬𝓾𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭...
It seems that I have got rather wrapped up (literally) in this year- it’s been Birthday season for my little family which has resulted in me neglecting the blog. SO, better fill you in on all the goodness I have been up to!
MACS- Yep M.A.C.S! I’ve been baking #couturemacaron for some very lucky loved ones and I’m excited to share them with you- the designs are fabulous, but the filling are mouthwatering also.
So, get your handbag, man-bag or bum bag ready; grab your keys and get really to leave the house/ your sofa or the office- cos after geezin’ at these beauties you’re gunna be DYING for a sweet treat! xx
♥ ♡ ♥
🎀 𝓟𝓮𝓹𝓹𝓪 𝓟𝓲𝓰 𝓜𝓪𝓬𝓪𝓻𝓸𝓷 🎀
Baked with love for my daughter’s upcoming Birthday’s. Adira is going to be 4 & Darzia 2 & they both adore Peppa Pig!
Darzia’s nickname is George so what better way to celebrate than with macaron?! Peppa (Adira) is holding Teddy & George (Darzia) is holding her bunny Robbie 🐻🐰
Flavours: (Peppa Pig) Passion-fruit buttercream with milk chocolate ganache centre, (Rainbows) Lychee buttercream with fresh strawberry cremé center & (Mini’s) fresh strawberry ganache oolalaaa!
Check out the little chocolate tails I made for the piggies at the end of the video.. they are soOOo cute 🐷💕 oink oink!! xx
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It’s impossible not to feel happy around these cookies! ٩(＾◡＾)۶
A little vid of the BDay collection…
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~ ❦ ~
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🎀 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓵 𝓜𝓪𝓬𝓪𝓻𝓸𝓷𝓼 🎀
A very special custom bake of #chanel #couturemacarons for some very special birthday babes commissioned by @sopheakseng_ 🙏🏻💕
Delectable flavors:
Espresso Martini - Vodka & Kahlua buttercream with espresso ganache
Tropical Gin Fizz - A mango, peach & passionfruit crémeux center enveloped in Gin buttercream
&
Pomegranate & Rose Gin Spritz - A pomegranate & rose gelée surrounded by velvety Gin buttercream
xx 💋
~ ❦ ~
🥓🍳☕ Breakfast of Champions ☕🍳🥓
Hehehe, what better way to start the day?! Made for my love’s BDay
Drool worthy flavors:
Takeaway Coffee Cups - Kahlua créme
Bacon & Egg’s (template design curtesy of the epic bakeress Katrina of @sugardevotion) - Tiramisu flavour - coffee ganache, mascarpone cream and fudge chocolate brownie chunks
𝓜𝓪𝓭𝓮 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 xx 💋
𝓛𝓪 𝓓𝓸𝓵𝓬𝓮 𝓕𝓪𝓻 𝓝𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓮
Vanilla Macaron Filled With Vanilla Buttercream, Vanilla Custard Center & Decorated with White Ganache Rose Buds
Well Hellloooo there!
Over the last few months, while enjoying Summer, I have been baking macaron!
These delectable morsels are the perfect treat to wander off into daydreams and wonderful thoughts with; while having some well deserved down time to relax and revel in the sweet pleasures of life! They are infinitely able to be adapted to different flavours and combinations, and extremely rewarding to make.
So what are these little things you may ask?…
Turkish Delight Macaron Filled With Rose Ganache and Real Chocolate Covered Turkish Delight
“A macaron (/ˌmækəˈrɒn/ mak-ə-RON) is a sweet meringue-based confection made with egg white, icing sugar, granulated sugar, almond meal, and food colouring.
The macaron is traditionally held to have been introduced in France by the Italian chef of queen Catherine de Medici during the Renaissance. Since the 19th century, a typical Parisian-style macaron is presented with a ganache, buttercream or jam filling sandwiched between two such cookies, akin to a sandwich cookie. The confection is characterized by a smooth squared top, a ruffled circumference—referred to as the “crown” or “foot” (or “pied”)—and a flat base. It is mildly moist and easily melts in the mouth. Macarons can be found in a wide variety of flavours that range from traditional (raspberry, chocolate) to unusual (foie gras, matcha).”
Earl Grey Macaron Hearts with Earl Grey Custard centre and Swiss Meringue Earl Grey Buttercream
Macaron are finicky, and an ongoing project of adjusting measurements and process to get perfection.
A special thank you to Camila from piesandtacos.com & Mimi from indulgewithmimi.com for sharing your macaron passion, advice & recipes about macaron. I encourage you dear reader, to pop on over to Katrina from Sugar Devotion’s Instagram page, oh my gosh- Katrina, you set the bar & drive me to keep practising!! Ladies, you are all such creative and inspiring artists & women!
Swing over to my Instagram stories and the ButterBING section of my website to see regular postings of my little morsels and other treats & things I’ve been making & creating =^+^=
Rainbow Macaron Filled with Vanilla Marshmallow Ganache
Caramelised White Chocolate Macaron with Caramelised White Chocolate Ganache & Dip
𝓩𝓪𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓼𝓲 𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓮𝓵𝓵 | 𝓜𝓸𝓮𝓷𝓪 𝓜𝓸𝔁𝓱𝓪𝓶 𝓕𝓾𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 & 𝓝𝓮𝓫𝓾𝓵𝓪 𝓟𝓪𝓲𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼
The following ‘Nebula Paintings’ are on display and exclusively for sale at the gorgeous new Zambesi Parnell store.
Check out Moena Moxham Scarves while you are in!
'ETHER'
Acrylic, glitter, matt varnish on stretched canvas, wax seal signature, Ø 607mm, ‘18, 1/1
$3000 NZD
‘SERAPHIC TABLE'
Modern side-table, acrylic, glitter, resin, seal signature, Ø 400 x 455mm, 2019, 1/1
$3000 NZD
'FIRMAMENT'
Acrylic, matt varnish on stretched canvas, wax seal signature, Ø 607mm, 2018, 1/1
$3000 NZD
ZAMBESI PARNELL
287 Parnell Road
Parnell
1052
Auckland
t. +64 9 308 0363
Opening Hours
10am - 6pm Monday to Friday
10am - 5pm Saturday
11am - 5pm Sunday
MID-CENTURY FURNITURE & NEBULA PAINTINGS
All other pieces are available to purchase through Moena Moxham.com
MOENA MOXHAM SCARVES
NEW DESIGNS LANDING SOON!
Just in time for Winter- Moena Moxham 100% cashmere scarves with unique designs from the paintings.
Available in all Zambesi stores - Parnell, Newmarket, Ponsonby and Wellington and for pre-order below.
p.s super luxurious extra thick ‘Cashmere | Pashmina Laddakhi’ scarves arriving after June
‘ETHER’
140cm² (55”²), 100% Cashmere, Eyelash fringe, Hand finished labelling, Reversible design
PRE-ORDER by ‘Pay Now’
‘FIRMAMENT’
140cm² (55”²), 100% Cashmere, Eyelash fringe, Hand finished labelling, Reversible design
PRE-ORDER by ‘Pay Now’
‘MISCHIEVOUS’
140cm² (55”²), 100% Cashmere, Eyelash fringe, Hand finished labelling, Reversible design
In Stock Now
‘ETHEREAL’
140cm² (55”²), 100% Cashmere, Eyelash fringe, Hand finished labelling, Reversible design
PRE-ORDER by ‘Pay Now’
‘YAYOI’
140cm² (55”²), 100% Cashmere, Eyelash fringe, Hand finished labelling, Reversible design
PRE-ORDER by ‘Pay Now’
♥
𝓒𝓪𝓼𝓱𝓶𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝓢𝓬𝓪𝓻𝓿𝓮𝓼
Art and luxury have gone hand in hand together forever.
Just like champagne and strawberries, some things are just meant to be paired. So there was no question when I decided to marry two of my favourite things; drawing and scarves that I would choose to immortalise these on cashmere.
A facet of my formal academic education is in Textile design, a medium I had moved away from in the last few years, leaning more towards fine art techniques and methodologies. Yarns, textures, embroidery, and fabric fascinates me and I find nothing more satisfying than being able to wear one of my artworks.
My travels through India, Kashmir, and Asia in 2017 culminated with my design ideas paring with new relationships in textile manufacturing. I was enraptured with the qualities of cashmere I could source, the traditional and modern textile application techniques I saw being used, the developments in printing that have happened over the last few years, and the vibrancy of the yarns and dyes I could work with. Fortified with vision, deeply inspired, and motivated to create a product of exceptional quality, I returned to NZ to create the masterpieces you can own today.
‘Moena Moxham’ scarves are uni-sex, transgenerational and very versatile. They can be worn as a dress, trussed or tied with a belt as a top, worn as a traditional scarf, shrugged on as a shawl or simply used as a blanket on long-haul flights or overnight excursions.
A statement on their own or to bring colour and pattern to a simple outfit, scarves have always been an essential item for the minimalist traveller and fashionista.
I am so very excited to invite you to view and purchase my new collection.
Aroha and enormous gratitude to the following fine souls for their immense skill, professionalism and collaboration on the featured photoshoots. Photography: Bern Stock. Hair: Josh Brown | CHOP Hairdressing, Male Model: James Butters | AI Fashion, Rock: T.W.Pattered
♥
'ᧁꪶⅈꪀ𝕜ꪶꫀ' & 𝓚𝓲𝔀𝓲𝓯𝓻𝓾𝓲𝓽 𝓐𝓻𝓽
Hi Five 'Glinkle' !
My partner and I are so very exited to announce we are expecting! Undoubtably the most involved, detailed and creative masterpiece I have ever collaborated on- we are so excited to meet our wee girl, nicknamed 'Glinkle' in late March/ early April.
The first four months of my pregnancy were rather challenging with intense 'morning' (ahem- lol, more like all day!) sickness. My empathy and compassion is deep and unreserved for women who experience this either briefly or for much more extended periods- it can be extremely challenging times making a human!
My incredible partner is an angel. I actually cannot articulate how much his love and support has been unwavering and all encompassing during these bumpy patches; I am so blessed to share my life with a man of such integrity, kindness, and compassion... not to mention creativity! These last few weeks have provided an opportunity for his creative skills to flourish- in particular, masterpieces created out of my favourite fruit kiwifruit!
As our gift to you this silly season, we share the giggles and joy from these artworks. May they inspire and make you laugh. Press play and please click on the individual photos- the titles are as hilarious as the creations.
For daily postings and the stories that go with the titles, follow me at @moenamoxham
Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and the very sparkliest of wishes for 2018!
'Elephant Patties For Breakfast, Thanks to Elvis The Crapulent Elephant In Full Party Mode'
'Arrg! Minions!'
'Weird Wayne From The OTHER Fruit Bowl'
'Ormando The Owl. The Fabulous Lady-Boi From Bangkok Now Living in Chiclayo. She Speaks Word of Wisdom, And Who Could Doubt Her With The Way Her Shoes Match Her Lipstick?!'
'Sonny The Sunday Samoyed'
'Ronald, Donald's Brother; The Punk-haired Younger Duck'
'Ned Flanders'
'Felonious The Monk', Thelonious the jazz musician's brother
'Jarvis The Jewish Jackalope, From Jersey City; The Fiercest Of All The Horned Hares'
💚 🥝 💚 🥝💚🥝💚🥝💚🥝💚🥝💚🥝💚🥝💚🥝💚🥝💚🥝 💚 🥝 💚
𝓞𝓯 𝓚𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 & 𝓠𝓾𝓮𝓮𝓷𝓼 & 𝓚𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓭𝓸𝓶𝓼
🇯🇴 The Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan 🇯🇴
Civilised, gracious, genteel, cultured, historical, expansive, and sophisticated are only a few of the adjectives that come to mind when I think to describe Jordan and the unrivalled authenticity and kindness of Arab hospitality.
Jordan is chic, and Jordan is very, very special.
Firstly however I would like to personally thank all the magnificent souls who took their time to share with me their energy, knowledge and the wonders of The Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan and Arab culture. To His Majesty King Abdullah II and her Majesty Queen Rania. To Eugene DeMarco, Her Excellency Lina Annab, Nadine, Mohammad, Ghazi, George, Raja, Hamsa, Samer, the Royal Jordanian Falcons. To the guides, and the fantastic hospitality from the accommodations I stayed… and special mention to Munther for being so immensely accomodating to our last minute changing of plans… tollerance level shinning golden! I was delighted and privileged to have the opportunity to come and discuss business endeavours and creative opportunities with you all. I am thrilled to find Jordanian resources well suited to the projects I have under development and to additionally find these facilitated and supported by like minded passionate individuals with vision; these are unique and valuable circumstances.
🌟🌟 🌟 🌟🌟
‘Mandala’, Gilt framed, dupion silk- padded when mounted, gold foil screenprint, embroidered signatures, (image) 450 x 500mm, 2015, 2/5.
Signature embroidery detail:
Gold M(oena) M(oxham) reflected 'knuckles' logo and Japanese Moena Moxham: Mo-e-na Mo-ku-sa-mu
萌名 木作夢 = Crush (as in the manga infatuation), Name, Tree, Make, Dream
Earlier this month I was delighted to be invited to attend a private audience with His Majesty King Abdullah II and Her Majesty Queen Rania. My artwork ‘Mandala’ was purchased as a gift to be presented to the King and Queen.
A mandala (Sanskrit: मण्डल, lit, circle) is a spiritual and ritual symbol in Hinduism and Buddhism, representing all existence. In common use, "mandala" has become a generic term for any diagram, chart or geometric pattern that represents the cosmos metaphysically or symbolically; a microcosm of the universe. Mandalas often exhibit radial balance.
The term appears in the Rigveda (an ancient Hindu collection of Sanskrit hymns) as the name of the sections of the work, but is also used in other religions and philosophies, particularly Buddhism.
In various spiritual traditions, mandalas may be employed for focusing attention of practitioners and adepts, as a spiritual guidance tool, for establishing a sacred space. They are used as an aid to meditation and trance induction.
🌟🌟 🌟 🌟🌟
Before I get on a roll, lets additionally clarify a little of the miss-information floating around about this country and locale though yar. I know first hand what it’s like to be geographically miss-located by association. New Zealand often gets attached to Australia (nooo.. we are not that little island down there- that’s Tasmania) or mysteriously placed up there with Switzerland in Europe (I know… it sounds a little like that doesn’t it lol), Jordan often suffers being lumped in with ‘troubled Middle East’.
It. Is. Not. It’s a forward thinking, safe, developed and delightful culture- quite unique unto it’s own.
It’s tight quarters, with Syria and Lebanon to the North, Iraq to the East, Saudi to the South and Palestine, Israel and Egypt to the West- this area is one of the longest populated anywhere in the world. With artefacts and cultural remnants dating back over 10,000 years, this family has long standing provenance. One, which I would like to point out over those with a mere 150 or 300 years of colonisation; a bit more experience in living together. I balk at the audacity and arrogance of those with less experience and their endless opinions about what is happening in this part of the world- those in glass houses shouldn't throw stones- certainly not at those who have foundations that go back as far as these guys do.
I’ve realised some rather interesting things in my time here in Jordan and they pertain to how we interact and empower each other.
My culture’s conflict has an awful lot of basis in possession. It dawned on me one day in Amman that this really is not the fundamental kernel of what is happening here in the Middle East. Conflict has basis in interpretation; in semantics, in the details of how things are understood- there’s a lot of intellectualisation about particulars.
I was fortunate one afternoon in-between my scheduled meetings to have the opportunity to visit the Jordan Contemporary Art Museum. It followed on to being invited to attend workshop afternoon with visually impaired children and the opening of the museum's latest curation (above). It was here I had a fascinating conversation with an Arabic calligrapher (1st & 2nd photos) about the details of Arabic language. Taken by Burmese in the weeks prior while travelling in Myanmar I had also fallen for Arabic- phonetic sounding/ symbol based recognition languages are my thing. In two days I had accrued the basics but was totally captivated when this man explained to me the following: marks placed above the script can define whether the word or concept is imaginary or literal.
An excerpt taken from 'The Subjunctive Mood in Arabic Grammatical Thought', By Arik Sadan, which I got submersed within in along my travels researching Arabic.. what a language huh!!
This blew my mind- he went on to discuss with me the formalities of brush strokes, the precise rules applied to the inclination and angles of the marks; the spacing; the thickness of line. Reminiscent of the formalities of Japanese script I was totally and utterly absorbed for two reasons- one, the beauty of the thing in itself and 2, because it gave me insight and perspective to the psychology of how this culture thought and the rules and parameters they feel are apparent within their historical structures.
This meeting also coincided with me finding great similarities in what is considered ‘Contemporary Art’ in older established societies and the techniques these places are using to teach young minds. That afternoon I was able to discuss observations from my travels and my experiences with scholars and those to the learned level of doctorate. Both in India and in Jordan, there are distinct categories of expression which were, and are, considered modern artistry. A derivative Cubist style, a geometric block coloured and textural expression, loose lined sketching, naive illustrative figurative works, poetic form cast in bronze, narrative illustrations upon ceramic.. and a few others. Consistent and parallel themes, and in some ways this could be construed as formulaic demonstrations of beauty. ‘This is considered acceptable’, ‘this is considered Art’, ‘this is how we do it’.
Watching the children in the workshop I considered my finding from India, now in Jordan and compared them with my culture. Was history repressing the ability for those here in older cultures to break out of set appreciations of ‘Art’ and expressive formula? Are these kid encouraged to make what they feel or are they being told what it should look like? How does a culture steeped in historical ideals of what is good and what isn’t take on radical and unusual deviations from this.. how does a new generation influenced globally by different media find a platform where their work is considered ‘good’ outside what is currently appreciated and has been so for many, many more years than elsewhere, and how does a young person wanting to be educated and find success within a system find a unique voice without being rejected from the structure which he/ she is being taught within… If I thought my country at times could be rigid and conservative I had just encountered a whole new challenging system. I also thought- how does a relatively new culture establish avenues for recognisable distinction within creative expression and how do we educate people to the long term values of craftsmanship and creative outlet?
That night I was wandering the streets down Rainbow Road and I was people watching; a favourite past-time. When Jordanians interact, it’s hard to perceive what is going on within the interaction. Ok, there can be hand waving, there can be different intonation and louder speech- but the energy exchange between two people, on average is very, very even. (* note- hand waving, yelling and loud talk does not mean the person is radical or violent- it just means they are impassioned &/or demonstrative- thanks media for mudding the water on that for viewers) It’s hard to tell who has the upper hand shall we say. Often when we communicate- we can see a dominant party, or one that is submissive to the others, or the appearance of power-play being employed. Culturally we have different ways of coming together anyway- like in India, interaction can be all balls blazing from the outset and then we work our way back down to mutual respect. In Arab interaction- there is much less crackle and fizz and more even respect.
The following day, I had the opportunity to talk with a man further about my observations. I’d watched a particular theme play out two times in the morning which I’d pointed out to him- once between two men at a kebab stand and another time between another group of men setting up stalls at Jerash. What looked like from the external display to be some type of heated discussion about a thing (the lamb and the beef in the first case, and the items in the stall in the second) was actually about the particulars of the details. The first men were discussing the better qualities of the meat and the second the particular correct placement of the stand and the items. Less literal about the stuff and more about the particulars… interesting spill over into the religious quarrels surrounding this area also.. it’s not about the Quran, it’s the interpretation of the messages within yar..
Is this not what happens as we get older? We get more particular about our perspectives, more entitled to our point of views, more rigid in our perception of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’; ‘good’ and ‘bad’ interpretations… we get grouchier about being confronted about these boundaries being criticised also…? It’s a hard thing to break out of system when we nit pick the details and impose controls yeah; but is this not a battle that we as humans have a daily self responsibly to consider opposing or contesting? Why.. I’m always asking why… and I can be juvenile of mind. I flick my concepts around play them out and I don’t settle for what are other people's ideas; I refuse to feel obligation or duty to ‘be’ or think a certain way. In other words- I don’t believe the hype and I don't do what I’m told is ‘correct’… oh what a luxury huh. Yes, it is a luxury to have had the opportunity to grow myself up making choices to being able to think & ultimately behave this way.
Above- Petra. A very special mention to Adeeb Alhasanat from Jordan Inspiration Tours who's knowledge about this area is vast and is a fantastic representative to impart information about the culture of Petra and it's former and current inhabitants- I highly recommend him and his company.
These older cultures on some levels can be rather serious and I considered why I assimilate so well with the playfulness of Asia. One, the belief systems align more to my values and two, well, they are far more ‘young at heart’ in a way. Creativity and that inner child come hand in hand. In order to think outside the box we need to be avant-guarde, we need to be able to take calculated risks, and we need to not be confined by constraints, rules and judgements. It’s very hard to do something new and revolutionary if people freak out about stepping outside what is established or recognised as 'acceptable'.
Ironically- my culture, although it appears to be laid back and relaxed (touted as a breeding ground for 'creativity') employs the highest level of psychological warfare I have ever experienced in any culture, anywhere in the world. Control comes in dangerous and subliminal form and restrictions are imposed everywhere. Here's an interesting thing though- it’s kryptonite for most Kiwi’s to not be liked; to not keep the waters even in their social systems and community; we don’t like obvious displays of conflict. We excel internationally because of this- we work hard and we are amicable but there’s a rather sinister side to all of this too- we are incredibly manipulative. Our society has many controls, but we learn how to to navigate and break them, not very pleasantly this comes with learning how to navigate a person also, we like put downs, we like perfectionism, we like making people do things one way and not show above this and we like blame and excuses. We have a problem with celebrating success and we undervalue people and skill... especially the accumulative and transferrable varieties. We perpetrate the mistruth of ‘luck’ and miss-inform people that we can all achieve profound fortune. That's a heavy load- yes, choice defines our direction, but I in no way believe we can dictate all of our decisions- we must work from what we have in the current situation. Ripples- build upon ripples. Is it any wonder our society is un-empowered- we constantly feel we can’t get it ‘right’, people feel bumped from all angles- internally and externally. Personal greatness comes in many forms… some doesn't look too flash to others…
Interrogation- predominantly utilised upon ourselves is reflective of intellectual snobbery and subliminal superiority. It creates crippling self-doubt within ourselves and creates shockwaves of insecurities within others. Through this, we penalise those less ingenious from trying to just get the job done in the manner they choose to try and do it. Not eating the right diet? not going to the gym enough? not doing the ‘right’ things with our kids? No rego, no permit, no degree, no prior experience... just not sure? With all this external expenditure of energy into other people's business or the surety of our own, it’s no wonder we feel depleted and in need to reach for things or people to fill these voids & cracks.
Was it Tom Cruise's character in Eyes Wide Shut that said something to the effect of 'morals are the obsession of the middle class'...? A heinous statement in some respects but one with validity all the same. When you're hungry, desperate or have 'nothing to loose' or, you make the rules, or can buy your way through them, you're not obsessing about strategising alternatives. Get the job done the way you choose with certainty. Self doubt, complacency and indecision is more harmful than anyone else's opinion.
The Children's Museum- Amman. Thought provoking and with colloquial delivery alongside appropriate examples pertaining to Arab culture- this is one cool assss learning spot.. shuffle over little ones, big kid wants to play too! Incorporating inspirations directly from Queen Rania, her vision has created a five star space for young and older alike to learn things about ourselves, the community and our environment.
Welcome Home.. I’ve been in New Zealand under 4 1/2 minutes, arriving in the wee hours after traveling long haul from Amman to Abu Dhabi, Abu Dhabi to Brisbane, Brisbane to Wellington. I’m hangin’ out at the baggage carousel; a lady walks past me and remarks about my attire. 'Well ain't you underdressed for this city love, you’re going to have a few problems’ she remarks towards my sleeveless red playsuit and referring to the nipply temperatures awaiting outside- to which I happily giggle and reply 'I'm a Wellingtonian honey; we're built tough & we like it chilly!’… inwardly groaning and in the back of my mind thinking.. umm nup, this has actually been perfect for travelling 25 hours..?!
Excuse me?- Who are you?! And why should I even feel compelled to gratify you with a response? Imagine if I hadn't been from Wellington- what a way to say 'Welcome!' no?! You are certainly not really worried about my comfort for you would have offered me a coat, and if you had wanted to have a conversation, I believe you may have slowed down rather than commenting as you walked past- jealous perhaps; can’t quite bring yourself to say- ‘I like what you are wearing’ so feel the urge to drag me down to gain a little power play.. yesss now I think we’re onto it.
Ironically this little interaction was actually perfect timing towards my mullings and musings.
Psychological warfare, power-play, control, interaction, expression and identity. I’ve learnt amazing things and recognised validity in my observations over the years in the last three months, but unfortunately they don't play out too great for my loved homeland.
The four main controls: ‘Woe is me’, ‘Interrogator’, ‘Intimidator’ and ‘Aloof’. Fascinating strategies huh… but lets take a closer look at what these really mean in society today shall we, because the outward use of these on each other is really nothing to what we are doing internally either. We like the concepts of doing good here in NZ and of karma, but we are crap to ourselves… that’s just as bad as hurting another yeah nah yeah!
The example above was a rather timely illustration of ‘Interrogator’. Putting someone else down in order to gain a feel good boost by taking a stance of superiority. I feel this lady felt she had it all together- she was prepared and had supremacy to my inadequacy in her eyes. Strategies employed upon another give an interesting indication towards what that person likes to pull upon themselves also- for many people don’t differentiate between personal/ professional, internal/ external, expressive/ intellectual. I feel for her children, I feel for her colleagues, I feel for her- my, my her standards are high.
Unusual? No. In Kiwi-land this type of interaction is rather common place. People’s level of interactive entitlement and self-righteousness is higher than anywhere else in the world; it’s not unusual for people you've never met to lean over and interject, fling a passing comment or add their two cents worth. MOST times these are kind, helpful, funny or build a sense of camaraderie, but they can be quite the opposite also and it’s out of your control if and when it’s going to happen to you. There can be something rather disconcerting about having to deal with this when ya leave the house. This doubt, these seeds of uncertainty can become poisonous to those who can remember and collect them. Feel those daggers in your back when you're dressed to impress? They might was well be real in this country because I would argue- that sensory pain does far more longterm damage than what that wound feels like in actuality because of how we comprehend and understand it.
Happiness and a sense of elation is a sign, recognised the world around of success. An outward display of personal contentment and joy; a thing of beauty and to be celebrated. In NZ this is actually a little backwards; happiness can become an affliction unless you build that hide tough- it's going to bring you some unusual challenges. Where joy spreads lightness among others in overseas environments- sharing a feeling of warmth, here, at times, it brings you the opposite- jealousy, criticism, envy and even more dangerously it incites people to sabotage or de-validate achievement. People take joy in breaking others and dragging them down. 'What are you talking about??!!- we are rated one of the 'happiest' nations in the world!'.. yes, apparently. Look around you, travel a little and compare, we're not- I don't know how we are measuring this statistic, but I can sure as f*&%k share that when you've been immersed in other cultures around the globe which ARE happy, when you arrive home there is a distinct and startling difference... and hey, these are only my impressions- perhaps you see another side :)
In NZ people are not valued- neither is individual skill- people believe in equality in a broad societal sense. We are brought up to think we ‘can do anything’; that anyone can gain the skills to be incredible. We are not built equal, I do not believe in this concept- some have talents, skills or natural dispositions that others cannot acquire. Through years of hard work and selection, choices and direction we can grow and hone these building blocks- but it is not by accident or ‘natural selection’ that some rise to greatness or find personal contentment. Unfortunately there is a common acceptance in this society that some are ‘luckier’ than others- this is not the case- some have fortune because they have worked for it, and they have figured out where there directions, passions and strengths lie... attributes still come with problems; and problems come with attributes. I build my amazing life, my skills, my talents, my connections, my work, overcoming my problems and growing my ripples. I will not standby and tolerate people wanting to take that away from me, nor slight, demean or control others by not validating their achievements and growth; nor obstruct them for wanting to have more or be better. A little side note.. we don't get things we desire if we hate the people or situations that currently have them ;)
Twice in the last two weeks I have had conversations on the topic of 'wealth distribution' which got me thinking on a deeper metaphoric level. Wealth, value and success.. the internalisation of these qualities imo is far more important initially to a person's growth and vision than the external- yet it is often the superficial manifestation that people get hung up on. Obligation, duty, expectations to share- there are extraordinary pressures that can come with feeling flush let alone being flush; and the manifestations of luxury both external and internal. To be open, approachable and amicable; to achieve, to allow others access to our gifts, our energy and fortune- where do people receive recognition for the distribution of their spiritual or conceptual wealth? Sharing talent is the gift of those endowed with affluence (personal fortunes)... it can be found in places of 'poverty' and of 'hardship'. If society doesn't validate or celebrate 'fortune' and 'success' in her less literal manifestations; our extent of poverty is far reaching indeed. How do we enlighten people that 'wealth' is the responsibility of the individual? and how to we encourage people to value themselves and moderate feelings of guilt, self worth and obligation when there are excessive pressures to constantly give ones energy, ones resources and ones reserves?
We have interesting complications and they seem to be compounding quickly. Scarily- to undo this, the main work comes down with numero uno. Unhelpfully, people are scared to talk honestly about their feelings for it having consequence upon their jobs, their livelihood and their opportunities.. and well, there's not a lot of courage to speak out about being disgruntled or dissatisfied- the increase in cost of living doesn't just effect logistics it greatly effects freedom of speech. You want to feel personal achievement in a professional environment- well that ain’t going to come from a community where those cannot validate personal achievement within themselves. Here again, is why it is very important to define and follow doing the things you enjoy and that bring you happiness- personal sucess comes from ticking off and chasing those personal goals. I cannot stress highly enough my encouragement to those of creative and ambitious dreams- GET OVERSEAS and slide a 'Big Picture' jigsaw piece in there. Yes, I'm not encouraging fantasy, I'm actually working on a project which helps others who have desire and drive to do just that. Just as an artist has to walk away from an artwork to get space, reflection and perspective, a person needs experience in other cultures to get fresh outlooks on their life.
Above- glamping at Wadi Rum- A very big ginormous شكرا to Bespoke Hideaways, Discovery Bedu W.I.L.D & quite literally off.the.beaten.track under the stars in the desert of Wadi 🐫
I love being in a country where I am respected; as is- as a human who is presented well and who is striving to do her best. Little things can make me really warm. Travelling around Italy and having chocolatey breakfasts with decadent croissants, strong ass coffee and Nutella makes my little soul sing- I shit you not that you can get raised eyebrows and little interjected comments eating this in NZ... shall I tell more stories?- God forbid you feed it to your little ones in public arrfg. The Nutella or croissant, perhaps, not the coffee... but well, kiddies in Japan love that also and that brings up a story about hitchhiking in the Land of the Rising Sun with a Bichon Frise ricocheting around a smart car filled with oversized stuffed plushie-toys being fed ice coffee from a bottle... the things I experience hehehe!! Even though I don’t personally drink booze, I adored walking into a petrol station where ya can buy fantastic bread, cheese, meats and alcohol to put together a picnic or dinner on the go. God I laugh at what would happen if we attempted to implement this in my homeland- we are not even able to drink a wine on our own beaches or in our parks… Trust issues eh... This investment into others wellbeing gets on my nerves- ‘it’s not good for you’ so this has been put in place- now adhere to it or else. Excuse me? I’m intelligent enough to make up my own mind thank you, and I don't need your opinion; nor should I be penalised if I find that my choice is incorrect, NOR should our past misdemeanours hang over us like noose impeding being able to give things another try within fair appraisal. Ie. just cos one dickhead ruined it, doesn't mean we all need to suffer ta, or just because something shyite happens doesn't mean a new legislation needs to be drafted. Life is about having a little naughty with the nice no?, and shit. happens. Responsibility… why does NZ feel it’s up to others to control this?
We encourage people to capitalise on ‘Woe is Me’, we berate ourselves internally using ‘Intimidation’ and ‘Interrogator’ about our diets, choices, decisions and appearances. We 'Interrogate' others psychologically and through other means to share and distribute their resources. We ignore and act ‘Aloof’ to those who deserve credit, we ‘Interrogate’ each other though email communication rather than resolving issues and conflict face-to-face and use litigation and fear strategies rather than just being personable. We control our society though ‘Intimidation’ by imposing intellectual superiority upon those of lesser means and we give completely inappropriate strategies to those less fortunate and then un-empower them when they don’t reach impossible ideals.
Ironically for a country that is built with pioneer spirit from all nations (that includes present tense- it takes a huge amount of this to emigrate here); people wanting a new system away from established structures; we have become more repressive than the lands we have departed from. Like over protective and anxious shepherds incessantly corralling and protecting our flock; we meddle, we worry and we leave nothing to natural order. Hey!- the flock is smart & the flock has grown.. there are sheep, there are wolves, there are rabbits.. hell! There’s the whole damn ark (lol). This strangle-hold will prove to do no good. It's choice that defines progression- if people are not enabled to make these in variation, for better or worse, growth becomes stereotypical and stunted and learning is formulaic and limited. 'What will be, will be'... super close to 'Inshallah' ("God (Allah) willing" or "if God(Allah) wills").. there is method to these statements; there's only so much a human can manipulate.
Self assurance and harmony comes from balance and a sense that one’s energy expelled is evenly replenished with energy gathered & consumed. In Western society we individually give an awful lot of this away in our interactions. We are taught to radiate outwards, but I came to realise while in Jordan, and through personal experience- we are not encouraged to develop the skills on how to reflect that back inwards or to moderate and reserve this technique. Our emotional intelligence is criplingly low. Those places with faith; the concept of a power bigger than ego on a big community scale; a power which can replenish and help a person with things that they themselves can’t manage, enables a person to have a link to that returning energy loop. It also helps us when we are not as far out on the ripples to find appreciation and solidarity within where we are, while getting to where we want to be- i.e that by continuing to do our best with what is present we can work towards a better future… this requires managing emotions i.e not freaking out, remaining calm and not throwing toys out of baskets or at others; constantly reframing back to what is good- even if that's minuscule.
Using a coping strategy or being involved in an addiction, to whatever it may be that a person wants to refill that void with (the feeling of being zapped mentally and /or physically) to top up their energy is the physical manifestation of trying to tie back in that replenishment of energy and love. It’s essential to learn about our emotions and feelings in order to do this- a little faith and trust is required in ourselves and in things working out ok. That ‘f’ word- I’m not just talking of a religious concept of ‘faith’- but if one chooses so, that may be where they find that link to love. Personally I find that link back to my beliefs of something bigger without being associated to a particular doctrine, rather to many and within my own conceptual developments (that includes the science and medical doctrine toooo); and within the activities that facilitate me being able to connect into happiness and a greater sense of lightness- the sea, the air, speed, movement, creative output. However, creative output has an awful lot of external energy expenditure associated- it’s historically well documented how this and addiction go hand in hand- how many artists, dancers, poets and other magnificent minds can we name who use(d) vices?- is it no wonder within cultures that radically think outside the box we are finding increases in coping strategies?! Plus, we can’t take away everyone’s strategies and not help replace them with better ones now can we??!! Smoking a fag takes a much shorter time than teaching oneself how to recognise the rise, fall and patterns of one’s anxiety now doesn’t it…. although imo, it should be my choice if I want to stay with the fag option to start with… everything in moderation consideration… and not everyone has the capacity to want to change.
Middle Easterners do not expel personal energy in the same format to Westerners- they are far more discrete and reserved- and I would say far more emotionally intelligent when it comes to a level of selection about how and when they radiate their emotional investment into others. We hold perspectives of ‘repression’ and ‘restriction’; we judge from our own West view because we only understand how we ourselves live and behave- taking their reservation for oppression; thinking our way is the best way to be- but I think there is a lot of method here which is very, very valuable and very misunderstood… and faaaar more developed. Oh how the media loves to wangle the burka & hijab- in Jordan, there are people of a great cross section of contemporary and traditional identity choices. Again, what is not chic about having things reserved for those we have selected of value to share with? Fascinating ideas for humanity innit when we start seeing how people have evolved socially to live together- for how we keep ourselves well, and for how we can come to understand each other much better and ultimately diffuse conflict and self-righteousness.
Conflict- we would like to say this is external. West; we like to point fingers over there to Middle East when we hear this word, but boy oh boy, I tell ya, we have this in far more dangerous form in our Antipodean communities. They might have the physical amphitheatres and places where gladiators battled, they might have flash points of war currently- but we all have created the psychological war grounds; the media of our criticisms; our ideals and projections upon each other; tell tales and mistruths of disgrace and disesteem.
Equality v balance. We seem obsessed with striving for the former and we are quick to pronounce other cultures which we perceive to not have these ‘rights’. I see far more value in the latter; balance, than the former. I vehemently believe in fairness but equality? We have different strength and weaknesses from physical to intellectual; we should strive to highlight and celebrate our power not deficiencies. Womens rights, roles and liberty… there are different guises in different cultures of these- just because they do not look like our Western format does not mean there is not balance there. The women I spoke to in Jordan in no way felt repressed and were angry about the portrayal of this within the media- as were my fair sisters in Kashmir. Their value in their communities and families was celebrated- no, it’s not the 'same' at times to their male partners and colleagues- but they’re praised and valued; recognised and celebrated for their skills making quality of living equations. And all of this is changing- with more choices, more exposure to opportunities, they are making decisions for themselves towards their dreams and education while incorporating these into their customs and relationships… that takes a lot of changes to preconditioning… that’s a lot for any human to take on. As I’ve said before- I’m the alien in this new land- it’s up to me to modify and take things on the nose if needed while finding a place where I hold my values and identity also while being open to new perceptions.. interesting balancing games eh. Queen Rania of Jordan is a shining leader in women’s rights, education and empowerment and her contemporary views and style, both of concept and presentation, is leading strong and unfettered Jordanians into a bright and fertile future- God I admire this woman. Rome wasn't built in a day peps- good things take time.
The history within Jordan of previous civilisations is at times daunting, overwhelming and completely humbling. I was struck a little jaw-dropped-oogle-like in Petra, Jerash and latter in Rome. At the ancient city of Gerasa just outside Jerash. I’d come to an intersection (above)- a meeting place literally from the four points of the compass for traders to arrive from neighbouring countries and much further afield. As I looked down, the paving stones below had grooves; ruts from oodles of years of chariots, carts, barrows and feet. Humans for centuries moving over the place where I stood at that point- that’s a bit mind blowing when we unpackage it; people living, dreaming, doing things, loving, crying and evolving; millions of stories- all varied, all different, all unique. Coming present day, in 200 years, this progression, this evolution and this hunger for energy has taken an exponential curve upwards. We are all hungry, hungry for more-ness of everything... and even if you're not into the stuff- you're getting energy in and from other things, people and places.
Poppies- dem reds!
There is just so much variation here- from pristine beaches to the red sands and majestic rock formations of Wadi Rum; the ancient ruins of Petra to the seaside of ‘Aquaba. The variations of colours from light aqua’s and gem coloured blues to iridescent oranges, peach, magenta’s, violet's and the soft creams of stoned cities to the eye popping red’s due to the the filtered UV light. The quietest city I have ever visited; Amman’s sounds of birdsong and the calls from the mosques reverberate in my memory with happiness alongside the irridecent red poppies- there is a calmness that permeates this location which is heart warming. From breathing in the oxygen rich air of The Dead Sea and experiencing bobbing like a cork in the mineral rich water, to flying upside-down over the desert in a Hawker Hunter fighter jet and an Extra 300L… I can’t articulate how much fun and excitement THAT is... especially when ya've got the controls weeeeeee!… all I’ll say is MORE MORE MORE!! =^+^=
There is so much vibrancy, there is so much LIFE! There is so much fun, laughter, warmth and value here; it’s so very graceful- I hope my writing defames some of the fallacies floating around and alleviates inner concerns about coming to Jordan to travel and/or conduct business. You have nothing to fear. It’s just yum… doooo ittttt.
... how big is my baggage allowance?
New cultures, old cultures… when it comes down to it- biologically we are all made of similar stuff- BUT we have conditionings that are different; neural pathways and flash-points which are different. Varied orientations for energy needs and ways of sharing these; and contrasting ideas that we believe in- all this shapes how we can progress, what makes us tick or repells us and how receptive or defensive we are to new information. Communication delivery can make a ginormous difference- most people don't like being told they are ‘wrong’ or finding out that a thing or ideology they have believed in can be done a different way or that there are other means to an end- and people can’t do things when they are paralysed by fear. This can be confronting stuff. If however, we can take the fear associated with change away; if we can show opportunity for discovery by loosening off a notch, we can make headway into areas of productivity and development. Fear of the unknown, fear of letting go, fears of not having enough… fears of others getting ahead further than we are… fears of not doing the 'right' thing... those feelings all lie inside not outside. We need to talk, we need to encourage others to have opportunities to get together to discuss face-to-face our ideas, or tribulations; our concepts and honest viewpoints; we need to mingle. Trust in our good judgements not panic at prospective terrors, trust in natural order (NZ stop freaking out that shit would go chaotic if it’s left to develop without being nanny’d) and respect the intelligence of our world inhabitants and individual decisions.
The more people experience suppression, the more people want change, and this shows foremost within our youth. If we are not educated; emotionally educated as to how to deal with the rollercoaster of reorientation and the personal confrontation of difference, we will only fracture our societies rather than grow forwards with solidarity.
We are all Kings and Queens of empires- the personal spaces of our thoughts and emotional orientation, and ultimately the lives we live and the choices which define them. Act reverent, act with grace, act with faith in your decisions and be proud of what you have achieved and what you will make happen in the future. إن شاء الله
❤ ❣ شكرا جزيلا ❣ ❤
'Leader'
'Leader', Digital collage from Instagram, 225 x 315mm, 2016
And I'm rather thrilled to have one of my photos taken in the Netherlands as part of the new Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May show; 'The Grand Tour' which is planned to air in NZ in December through Amazon Prime. Look out for Episode 5... or keep an eye on this nifty wee sight THE GRAND TOUR
GTG- Going. To. Ground; the misunderstood baby of the Creative Process
Over the last eight months I decided to take a closer inspection of my personal creative process. A logical and systematic study of the methodology and symptoms of each of the passages I work through, in correlation with creative patterns I had already ascertained. Each time I decide what I want to achieve next, I go through this process. We all live an emotional line which waves and dips, yet I feel compelled to share my recognition of some of the more difficult side to being able to make ideas become tangible, because this part is very rarely discussed and I believe, it’s actually the most important and valuable part.
Each time incrementally the stakes get higher; as in I propel myself though a more challenging state of change with more audacious projects because the evaluation of my limits, the risk involved and skill base has changed and grown. These ‘states’ are not all pretty, and although there is a lot of understanding out there about making and creating; the therapeutic outlet or physical result and beauty of creativity, very few people talk about the complications and challenging passages within the same context. 'Creative Process' is just art wank snobbery- we all live this pattern in varying degrees; where I draw another does sums, where I fly another gardens... 'creativity', in my opinion, essentially is listening to yourself and what makes you fizz.
Growing up in Wellington, an uber artistic town, has given me a unique insight into how we think, make and behave, and how this works and shapes a community. What I have noticed through my own life, and by being gifted with the ability to critique and reflect on my own process is that the ‘down’ side is right where the intervention of medicine, detrimental clinical and social evaluation and the labelling of psychological ‘disorders’ or symptoms (either self diagnosed or external) can come in. Raise the hands for a stress jammer, a blank out, pain relief and a comfort giver; Western culture point ya fingers at eccentric, out-there, weird, crazy or sick. I think this is also why a lot of people hide away and deal with these patches in private- it’s not easy not having it together all the time, and who wants to open themselves up to others for judgement on top of it?!
In the past I have tried all sorts of different strategies for self-help in these times and it is in these periods that if the sensitive creative brain is allowed to go a little too loose in it’s own attempt to remedy itself, that the shit can start to go pretty pear shaped. The most powerful help is talking. Why I am talking and writing is because as we evolve and become better at doing things, humans also become less tolerant to fixing bumps with hard work and time and want easy answers to bad stuff which is the better-at-doing-things brother from another mother. Re: previous post, ignorant appraisal is undone by open communication.
In my teens after battling with depression I tried medication. I lasted about two weeks. It made me feel ‘just below’ the living line and it killed any type of colour or creative spark I had in me. I felt in a fog, I feel beige and my vision and recognition of colours and concepts slid off and was muted. But I also knew that my behaviour was not helping. I was drinking heavily, I wasn't sleeping, I was in a very complex living situation, having just turned 16 I was at university and working to support myself; diet was completely up the whack and I was partying like a ninja- wild extravagant awesomeness but with complicated repercussions. I knew by being honest with myself, that that spark was actually my ticket to life and that my conduct and the situations I was into needed to be adjusted, NOT the spark.
I knew what I felt and I knew I had to work through organising myself by doing the hard yards or the alternative was mighty unappealing, also I could see a pattern and was intrigued about it- I knew then that the dark was as valid a part of my gift as the light. Plus I came up with some pretty cool stuff in those patches. I also had recognition from within my family that this was something I could learn how to manage and use to my advantage- very important opportunity there. I was encouraged to understand and to sense what happened or changed within myself and to notice patterns. My family heritage is very scientific/medical/mathematical and very creative/artistic (Oh and racing drivers, an art historian, explorers, a prime minister and persons of political standing, gold miners, a land information strategist, a missionary to China, agriculturalists, a bareback hose riding milliner- and that's only a selection of recent generations...umm rather strong willed souls…) but on track, what I want to illustrate is that patterns of thought and emotion were already recognised within my family- coupled with a ‘get on with it and sort it out’ attitude. I could talk my way in and around a psychoanalyst like a corkscrew; it was up to me to get through this, tbh- no-one else had the skills because no-one else had the whole back history of what happened and was happening, and it was so goddamn unusual and complex by that time I couldn't be bothered trying to explain it all.
3rd stage of creative process is the ‘this is shit/ I am shit’ area, Otherwise known as ‘going to ground’, ‘working through the nobblies’ or ‘dropping out of the system’; its not really physical, this very hardest part of the process is psychological, but it does have physical fallout. It. Is. Really. Difficult. It is where questioning, doubt, anixety, freakouts towards self abilities, self loathing and the unnerving state of living with a different brain activity resides. It is dark, can feel unending and hopeless, and very confusing. To me it feels like being shattered and rebuilt; not only in the project, but in my spirit. It is an integral part of the process, yah, pain and payoff, but as I have got older I have recognised I can also do something productive and target a mental attribute in here alongside working on an idea. I go for something that’s hindering me, festering and is a part of my soul that needs to be unpackaged, remedied and resolved. Not fixed- it’s not broken, it just needs some attention. It is a roadblock to the other side; undertaking has an open-ended timeframe, there is no schedule within this sector; its a progressive process, and it is extraordinary mentally and physically draining, but there is a wonderful feeling of success by getting over the Bog of Eternal Stench. Actually- it really is just like getting held up with Sir Didymus chewing the fat.
Let’s call this ‘going to ground’ as GTG for the sake of my digits and getting this out eh!
The symptoms can be pretty terrifying towards the climax of it- it seems to have an upward bell curve. Exhaustion, excema, hypna and hypnogogic (a type of pre and post-sleep sensory hallucination/ audio/ dream state that happens on the edge of consciousness), muscular tension, cravings (for all sorts of things, other ideas; relief really, it’s the point where we hit being creatively over it), very little quality sleep once ya finally get in there aaand the ‘racing-head-state’. This is when it is in hyperdrive. It really is nuts over this period and it can be very scary; continually bouncing around contemplating and searching for things. Once the key emotional concept or idea abstraction has been resolved and illuminated however, quite literally overnight, everything clears up. Actually, that’s kind of scary also because you could really be forgiven for thinking this is all completely nuts- because it is conceptual. There is no physical ball clinking down a slide saying ‘HEY! Ureka! You got it!!’ I just know within myself I’ve had a ‘Ureka!’ and that the circle has past GO again.
Lets roll with this ball image. Because I actually visualise my ideas like that. When I am thinking about what I want to do next, what I'm aspiring towards, what helps others and what is challenging; + if it has become time for a very big overhaul then who and what I want to be, look & behave like, in come the balls and the basket.
I am not only thinking about what I want to achieve, but I am very detailed about aesthetics, logistics, practise and what I need to know within this too. Into the basket over the weeks, months and much longer, ‘big’ heavy ideas come down, quite distinct from general brain chatter ideas and fill it up, sometimes some get taken out and replaced with others, and other times a particular ball grows in complexity. Every day I take them out and play with them, thinking about the attributes and making physical actions towards the things I can do that add towards each. The basket slowly becomes filled with usually about 7 orbiting biggies which break down into more elaborate subcategories- ha, that took a while to figure the gauge. Yer, actually visualised in a whicker basket (my Nana and I used to collect flowers in it), each a different colour and moving, changing and dynamic like nebula. I can slide into each and see how they are progressing. They are things I am working on, things I want to do, make and achieve and all manner of other things, but there is also always one ball about my personal identity- which contains a quality I would like to better, learn, refine or remove and facets within this of my relationships with others, the environment and myself. The diversity of these keeps in balance my obsessive tendency by giving me the freedom to swap between things, especially if one has stalled... or perhaps just spread out that obsession lol
After each ‘project’ or transition, in a type of summary I file and shelve the baskets which pack down origami style from 3D to 2D and are organised into a big khaki metal filing cabinet ‘long term memory’… funnily from my dad’s office that I used to go to when I was a child... I wonder if the next generation thinks of an app logo?? I often go back in this space when I need to dig around for something and re-inflate baskets and withdraw balls. Sometimes searching for a tool or experience which can help in the present, sometimes looking for inspiration or a piece of the jigsaw for an idea. These are decades old- my memory is gargantuan and I can recall events, imagery, sensory incidents, ideas and thoughts back to being a very new infant- wooow I hear you say, yet this has very much been a double edged sword of a gift; it comes with recollection of every bad thing in just as vivid detail.
In my working headspace there are different baskets in circulation too, projects floating in foreground and background and they are not static, they elevate or diminish depending on requirements and validity. Most people try obsessing about an idea with total surrender or desire when they imagine their future partner; holding onto the concept and furnishing it over time. I have trained myself to do just this but over many diverse ideas & investments, and to sustain the development over months and often years. The cool thing about doing this is that these 'dreams', these ideas significantly impact what we do and who we are, because we collect and input activities and behaviours which match our vision. This is why I love encouraging people to find what they love, because by building towards something amazing, fun and great, it in turn helps the individual become just the same thing. Gawd, I could start getting really in depth, but I think it's best I keep to simple in this blog right or things are going to get sqiggly… and well, I prefer organically sharing things with people when the right time arrises within conversations that have relevance to the parties involved.
Dealing with festers, parts I don't like about myself and just general total questioning and tip-the-whole-fucking-thing-upside-down-and-shake-it-it-all-needs-to-be-rearranged mentality is what comes up in the already complex GTG area- yerp, when it rains it pours. Validating it is the mucho grande super key component, it becomes as important as the other balls. Over time, this allows me to come to a level of understanding about whatever it is that time and let it slide away. It’s like a pay-off. This process is only my process because of how I am built and what I can and cannot live with based on my morals and thought patterns, but I know others feel and go through a very similar pattern. My focus (interchange with obsessive nature- these qualities aren't to be scared of; they are mighty useful when channeled into the right zone and honestly, success comes snuggled up with addiction and obsession; it's a matter of dealing with it not being scared of it) knows that my brain needs a type of clarification or monkey chews in loop. I don't like loops, I like resolutions so I can grow into the next thing. Writing about this makes it sound if everything is judged and rigid but it’s not like that, less anal retentive and more playful organic perhaps. Planned and unplanned, flow & structure, control and fluidity; little curling mind waves. Sometimes resolution is quick, other times not so as it bubbles along at life flow.
Over the proceeding project and in the new idea phase, pointers and markers within me and my experiences direct me to what this next dark baby is. There is no question in my heart what it is by the time the balls are clear- there is actually no denying it within myself, and if I try to do so, things happen to very clearly remind me that I cannot wiggle away. In lieu of having bairns of my own I have behaved as if mother to my existence through my actions and my ideas- I think that's a rather wonderful way to exist and fascinatingly there are similarities in timeframe also.
Structured art making is the precursor to GTG. This is a happy and light stage; usually production of the resolution of ideas from the previous project experience, recently London and The Hague. In one light it is not the ‘real’ hard work. I would say that the sailing through the darker waters is actually the greatest art in itself, actually, lets go bigger than that, I really think the best art we make IS life, yes- we are all artists. 'Dark' is not necessarily sad either, it's a different type of energy or situation than that; it's like an emotionally dense and invested area- it can be happy but there is a lot going on.
In the past I have caused myself serious physical damage by not gauging what level of physical activity I can couple with my headspace at this particular time. I have realised I require habitual activities which are not high impact because I hurt myself if I do that- not in accidents but in quantity. I don't realise I’m pushing too hard because I’m trying balance out the level of stress and processing that’s going on in the noggin. Yoga, squash, cardio, swimming, and many others have been in that slot and although they work for the mental side, I have a tendency to take the amount into the extreme because brain is going gogogo- and so body gets pushed to gogogo also. I am a very tenacious animal. Incoming: collateral damage: I put my physical health secondary. Those activities I am passionate about can come back in at a different stage, but I have to be very aware within GTG what I choose and in what proportion. This time my new activities were teaching myself to ride my bicycle with no hands (that's around corners too) and standing tree pose for extended periods with my eyes closed. As I mature, I am better at being able to cut myself some cord and validate taking care of myself- but I think this is what is very challenging maybe more so for some of us than others. Yeah, yeah ‘take care of yourself’ we hear, um- yeah, I am trying to, but I don't have an off switch and I'm focused on bigger things.
Overall the whole system is quite balanced- hence my assimilation with yin and yang, juxtapositions and spectrums because this is a direct reflection of living for me- OOOooo idea! Love it.. hmm hate it… Ok, not so bad.. Ok yeah, really fucking love it! Yet, it takes exertion to get it circulating and keep it so; making choices to change and focus attitudes. Perhaps a more accurate image which correlates to yin and yang, is this system as like ascending a spiral staircase where the light bulbs have blown in spots; the stairs are still there it just takes care, use of different senses and a change of pace to continue escalating. Aim of the game is to advance and make the next progressive move in order to not be stuck on a landing on the same level, or dip backwards; all about timing and sometimes requiring hanging out for a while rather than moving. Duality is the nature of life; where in one place it is day, another has dipped into night. When one is happy, another is sad; when it is summer in one location, another shivers in winter; where a new life is born, another passes away. Without this darkness the very essence of creativity wouldn't exist as it is itself; the left to it's right, the hot to it's cold, the back to it's front.
Cognisant thought and vivid memory has at points made me scared in my life. I am super aware of my conscious; of decisions and why I am doing something. I can give you a very direct reason for every single decision dating way, way back and the ramifications and relationships that has to other components. That has been challenging in my life to learn how to deal with. Awake, and asleep- but what do you do when there is much more ‘awake’ going on and very, very little 'sleep'?! Well, you naturally want to knock yourself out a notch right. All of us do to a certain extent with anything that brings ease; everything has a time and place. We share a very basic primal need for hugs of brain and body.
Unfortunately because of the level of energy zipping in at times, sometimes the more gentle avenues of comfort don't work so well, and some things that others can use have disastrous consequences due to my mental and chemical make up or because I abused them in the past; i.e. sugar. I make my own choices on my own needs and feelings, but over the years not all of these were fantastic, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do and learn through the process. Looking at static sitting meditation for example, my tolerance is comparatively low. It took me a while to realise through all this guru competition and advice out there that my activities were meditation but at a different levels. The experiences I felt as I ‘popped to the left’ or found another space in my cognisant awareness where the motor was powering away in one room, but I had slipped off to another, was a powerful thing to realise. I have been immensely fortunate in my life to be able to fight for what I love, what makes me fizz and happy and hardline into these spaces. It is why I am passionate about helping others find what they adore also, because pinpointing a fizz = happy = learning & retaining = inspiration = healthy = constructive existence.
All the activities and passions I adore and have excelled at were initially introduced or imparted to me through people I have loved, admired and respected (or I was told I 'couldn't do it')- I think there is nothing cooler than being able to pass this type of connection and inspiration on to others. The only control one can have over these life changing meetings is by following what we love to become better and happier people- kinda simple equation aint it- yet the simplest things can often be the most challenging. Affluence affords the ability for a person to make more choices based on feelings rather than solving restrictions, but when you don't have this resource, nor emotional support to have the courage to fight for these pleasures, life becomes immensely more challenging and complex. A little encouragement, a little investment of one-on-one time, goes an incredibly long way in helping another find surety within themselves, their esteem and ideas, and ultimately their success. Interestingly however, life has a way of working with us and helping out with this equation the more that’s powered into it both in action and belief.
My church has two wheels, snow underfoot, clouds as the congregation and a pounding base line like a heartbeat as hymns. The infinite combination of inconsistencies and conditions are my playground and often the adversity of these combinations where I find delight. High winds, night-time, low visibility and howling storms bring me a sense of contentment and connection to being alive; immersed within the energy surrounding me and I perform better within this. The theatricality of my homelands' weather playing a huge part within my comfort and conditioning. I don’t care about where the 'creative process' leads, I just enjoy the moment it currently positions me within. What's the meaning to it all? I'm not interested in figuring that out, or, well there isn't one really to me- I just get on with it is as best possible; I love experiencing all the kaleidoscopic variations. Experiencing not recording- you won't find me with a Go-Pro or camera attached to me or posting heaps of action things- I'm playing not faffing and fucking around, and I'm not interested in participating with others who recording-shaking-their-tail-feathers comes primary to getting out there. Privacy and discretion are important qualities to me and who I am with at the time are the most important people who deserve my undivided and full attention.
I get bored by things I have followed through to fulfilment, or worked through previously, so crave the next step up. Actually I cannot keep humming harmoniously unless I continue to find the next step up because what worked in the past was a for a different me at a different stage, with a different set of variables. ‘Step up’ isn't necessarily an evaluated risk either, it can be, but it also can be just something different. I am far more interested in experiences rather than things and testing out knowledge or phycological tools- hence me shoving my gluttonous spectrum back into a nicer area, or maybe just internalising where it’s not so obvious lol. Actually I think I’m happy to admit that- I’m a mind pig. Sharing time is my #1 most valuable and luxurious commodity.
Determining a safe living environment is immensely important and challenging; predominantly because I do so many different things with a high proportion of change. This time it was much less about supplying and more about reduction or removing. The more you travel, the more you know you need less, and I get a great sense of satisfaction from resolving things using limited resources. I need a little stress to learn, but I am particular about why and where and how much, especially as I can veer quite easily into whoop-nelly-put-the-brakes-on-how-the-hell-did-that-all-get-there territory. Sometimes heart decisions propel me to do something that only later is revealed how important it was for me to jump at that time. Selling Maria on the way back from the Netherlands is a prime recent example. It felt right (in a sad way), the right people had come to light and the process was smooth, it was the ‘right’ thing to do on a emotional, logistical and financial basis, but it wasn’t until later I saw how not having access to being able to jump in my car was a useful tool; some of the best are the missing ones. My car had also become an identity hairy handbrake- I had grown through that woman and wanted to become my next incarnation.
The equation of boredom + self absorption + loneliness (not of people, it's a deeper current) + propensity for greed/ lust/ gluttony (ideas, information, and knowledge; consumption | production & receptor | creator out of balance) = Miss Murcott on the brink of a not good coping strategy and needing self intervention. Self intervention foremost- not action, information, or any other thing but to stop, un-package, breathe and give recognition to not feeling great- validation is tremendously important for me. Location: DEFCON 5; if I shoved anxiety or negative sensations under the blanket at this point I used to resort to a pervious not so good fill. That used to be hard when I was tired, stressed, confused/ feeling isolated; a little lost within an activity, been travelling for many hours or was in GTG. However, understanding this pattern was essential learning in order to become the woman I am, undertake the complex things I do, and develop further within the lifestyle I adore. Most of the time I succeed, and on occasion I epic-ly flop but Ill let ya in on something, as soon as we can define and talk about something, very quickly that thing starts to diminish and become manageable. Without these qualities, I would never have become so good or tenaciously invested into things in the first place; often the compulsion to do something amazing comes from the fire/ anger/ pain of something quite opposite.
Oh, but wait, if you're thinking this is elaborate enough there is another pattern that is added to this as a woman. The monthly cycle of hormonal, physical and emotional complexities associated to just being born in these amazing bodies. What is depression, what is pre-menstrual tension, what is related to the idea, what's just grumpy tummy?! We are built to be the greatest creators of our species, but this comes with intricate attributes. It is like a giant tapestry of different lines of coloured emotional flux and wane; incredibly complex and unique to each of us. Unless I wanted a catalogue of definitions, I was quite happy to discard the labels; rise to the challenge and navigate each day, each combination with it's own countermeasure. The recognition of these patterns are as important as the former- because yes, at some point both GTG and this will align, and whoah nelly that’s one to sail.
As a woman creative in particular there are interesting additional challenges related to this existence, but where I found strength because early on it was like ‘so, we are trying to medicate the essence of what I’m born as/ with?!’. If you know a young creative, perhaps now with a different perspective, the challenges of not only all this, but the pressures of identity, body image, bullying through social media, a recording device every turn just ready to catch you as you discover, explore and play; societal pressure to behave and look a certain way, oh plus figure out what you do and are of corse; you can seriously be forgiven for transgressions no? Actually I think we have a bigger problem with the next generations in that they are too scared to actually let loose. Because what you learn in this necessary process is that you are not the centre of the Universe, no-one really gives a shit and that ya need to get over yourself. Doing something a little too much and going a bit far teaches us a very valuable lesson involving ego and entitlement- a young person can't get this 'oh!' if they can't push the envelope.
There is absolutely no question that there is a particular demographic and profile which is more susceptible to having some complicated challenges, but they are only that. Attributes come with problems, and problems come with attributes. 'Naughty' more often than not, is 'bored' and 'mighty smart' in a misunderstood and frustrated package. I used control over my weight and body image as a young person as a tool for me to retreat back into working with and untangling the first puzzle I had be born with; I wasn't ready for round two at age 10. Nor for the revelations of quite unusual gifts and the awareness that came with so young. My revenge upon the world for complicating my existence by giving me all these cool qualities but quandaries that went with, was to take that fire and turn it internal. It’s hard to talk as an adult- but yet we expect a child and teen to be able to articulate intense feelings from complex circumstances?! It's not an unusual tactic for smart cookies to resort to behaviours which alter sensory perception in the attempt to reprogram themselves and find contentment- strategies that with the influx in accessible information/ knowledge/ introspection and loneliness, will become more and more prevalent within society as we progress. If a person is making stuff or participating in forms of expression; i.e. changing and playing; they're feeling things- these creations say a huge amount about how they are processing life- less focus on the stuff, more on the feel.
All of this sequence recognition takes a significant amount of time, modern world you just don't like this. It also takes a huge amount of faith and belief in personal processes and composition. Some physical; anatomical, biological and hereditary, some cerebral and sensory, and some esoteric. I believe that no way is 'the' way, we are all made up differently- no metaphysical, therapeutic or psychological way by itself has all the answers because that is hooning in one direction with blinkers on. Many terms and classifications are interchangeable too; they are the same thing from different angles. Plus, science has no grasp on feeling- we are utterly unique in how we individually perceive this, there are many variations in intensity and subtle differences between qualities. It takes recognition and use of the whole system together to get this human safe and healthy.
Life can be pretty hypocritical; many 'bad' things are 'good' in different packages, it's just society has attached stigmas associated to one and not the other. My reality sees it that if something is enjoyable and productive then it is valuable, I make my own opinion about whether a tag is relevant. I wanted to learn about myself and who I am by doing the hard yards because I knew I could make myself well, and that the well went with the unwell hand-in-hand. I think this is where the modern world is getting to a bit o’ a problem. We are well and unwell, but people would rather not admit that. There is a lot of fear and competition about pain. A traumatic life experience for me may be just as significant and as painful to you as burning the cookies with all sorts of expectations and pressures tied in. In my experience, the proportion of trauma is always balanced out by periods of healing; what goes up, must come down and vica versa. When a child is screaming after falling over and grazing their knees, we instinctively give love, compassion, recognition to the experience and validate that they are hurting- why is it that as adults this pattern is forgotten? It is only the ego that has an age- the soul is still the child wanting a hug and to be told it's ok.
“We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in public.”
A huge reason why I went to Japan was because my soul was missing a jigsaw piece of a spiritual element, and I knew it was there. I don't know how, sometimes I just know things; I completely trust my intuition for my requirements. We all have special gifts for our stories but there is a vast amount of work involved in order to hone them. 'Follow the dream', hmm, that always sounds like there is a trail to follow, where I see it as a seek-&-discover and a build in progress through choices. I have resolved many dreams and mastered different vocations (or portions of bigger visions depending on which perspective is taken); one of my special knacks is that I relish, enjoy and seek growth through change. My life has taught me that you can do anything you set your mind to, but it works like a ripple; each layer building upon the former. My mind may be set on something, but my spirit is the one to guide me through the paths to achieve it. Going gang busters independently from very young has meant my boundaries and seeming limitations have been tested differently to the average and I have learnt and honed a sense of sureness in accordance to this. There is validity in a great variation of purposes, but the individual has to sharpen a sense of intuition in order to learn how to trust themselves through making friends with their mind. Couple that with passion, timing, attitude, tenacity, optimism and woooork, and you've got special sauce in the mix. What cannot be overlooked however, is what price are ya prepared to pay for that vision? There is always consequence.
Please lets be clear, I am not denying the benefits of medical or clinical intervention, actually quite the opposite- make up your own mind, but we can mend ourselves much better than most people realise. A closer inspection of a need may highlight that a resolution lies in an alternative avenue; just as constructive but without profiteering and fear attached alongside. And without blanketing the emotion or transferring it, rather un-packaging and recognising it; although sometimes we need to procrastinate or chip off a portion in order to get somewhere, and to have fun! Unorthodox often gets slagged as radical or reactionary- but remember, what is now considered 'normal' at one point itself was unconventional. What works for me, won’t be for another because this thing called life is totally unique with a personal collection of skills, viewpoints and things that have happened along a lifetime. I’m shining light on something complex, misunderstood and rarely discussed because when we hear something that resonates with our stories, it has a profound effect on not feeling so much like a satellite. That can be one sentence in a 1000, it doesn’t need to be the whole heaving set. Or another persons experience can ignite an ‘ahuh!’ set of dot connects inside which is coooool as.
Who I meet along my journey is far more interesting to me than what I accumulate, and those things I do adore I share, use as tools, get the best that I can at the time, play with without abandon and really, really enjoy. Do it once, do it right (and maybe repeat if it's really really great hehe). I have been radiantly flush and I have been stone cold broke for long periods, but often in those latter patches they were the times of the greatest happiness; regardless of either situation I am far more 'rich' than any sum could denominate. I totally fucking feel that- no. bullshit. You can strip me of everything (been there on more than one occasion) and it would now have absolutely no effect upon my mental health or ability to live, survive or rebuild my life. My existence is one of ultimate luxury because experience and connection is my gold and I let nothing define me. Don't get me wrong- I love cash, it's totally necessary and an awesome thing- you're not going to find me in a free-love commune (yeah, tots not my thang); I like commerce. But if I hadn't taught myself to let go of the worry associated with it, I would not be able to focus on elaborate long-term projects because they'd always be undermined by lack of funds.
I wasn't always this way- actually quite the opposite as is the case with taking on most big curves, life can be confusing and contradictory at times. I choose to do this, to challenge myself, to see what happens and how I feel if things drastically change because it makes me confront myself and my priorities. I have been selfish, belligerent, ungrateful, vicious, egotistical, confused, greedy and gluttonous, materialistic, unbalanced, with almost non existent self esteem, broken, lonely, unhealthy and very miserable at times within my life. Some of the most valuable qualities to me now have come from being their opposite and converting them with a desire and dedication to be better. Without 'bad' qualities recognised and in their working uniform, nothing amazing can happen at all; without 'want'; desire or a certain variety of greed, we cannot be better, or be compelled and driven to ambition. Without covering my lack of self esteem at some points in my life with ego, I wouldn't have had the courage to jump when I had to; without at times being self centred, well, I wouldn't have survived- it's just becoming more aware of ourselves though experience, trial and error and testing those boundaries that we can recognise what things really are, where they sit on those shoe lace spectrums and how to navigate, develop or reduce particular attributes. Everything has it's reason for being useful.
Living fluidly doesn't control what emotion gets thrown in on the journey either, it's a case of just sorting it out as it comes; unconventional lifestyles have unusual complications and pressures. Yet, humanity is forgetting that well behaved and ordinary does not make history. With a predilection for critical attitudes and an obsession with flawlessness and rivalry we have a bloody tough environment for kids (adults) to learn who they are and find a unique voice. Time to get uncomfortably comfortable. What happens in my brain by collecting these black ants in white rectangles and sharing them is as magic as what then infiltrates and bounces around in yours after reading. Sharing is caring, but what level of censorship or authenticity this has can make a fundamental difference to whether anything sticks, is beneficial or ignites a spark of inspriation.
‘Going to ground’ resolves itself; it is finite, and it’s followed by ‘This is fucking cool…again’. It is inevitable as the wheel turns, a lot of getting though is just holding on and having the tenacity to not give up or have a wobbly and discard the basket. If the basket is filled with true heartfelt idea loves then they will pull though. It is a just a matter of time, a matter of process and a matter of continuing to make small steps of work towards them through what is presented in the forefront of life within this. What we learn in any undertaking is far more valuable than the thing or result; realisations and epiphanies which shape and refine us. There is method to the madness within this also, if something isn't gelling, leave it lie for a bit, pick up another ball and have a play and see what grows furry in the meantime and pops out of brain chatter.
Humanity enables history to repeat itself because it is all most expect. There has to be faith in what is extraordinary before any pattern or proof in this configuration revels itself. It is there, and it is as fundamental as the molecules that connect us, the world and the Universe, but it requires dedicated energy towards deflecting sabotage, and defence from external and internal attack. We get thrown new and repetitive challenges and tricks to entice us off path, or see whether we'll throw a wobbly; another round on the landing or 'ohh, no, did that last time, new solution required' situations. Every few months over the lat nine I have been tempted by job offers at Peter Jackson's Weta Digital- little fork-in-the-road-carrot-dangles, often appearing right after having gone through a challenge with what I have been focusing on, and initiating me to evaluate my investments and aspirations. Pressure of modern society can easily spark jitters and financial matters can sway many people, but man made paper (eesh, its not even that anymore; numbers and electrical currents) i.e.; cachinga, is not what makes the world go round. Money is not the dominant energy. An idea, a desire, helping someone ya do or don't know, breaking a habit, political change, fixing the leak, resolving an engineering problem, breaking a habit, a pinpointed strategic and productive response to a facet of the changes in climate we are experiencing- it all starts in this pattern with making the next right step for what we are doing at the time. And I'll tell ya a biggie- helping others and changing the world for a better place starts with learning how to change and better ourselves.
People say "well I'm not going to do that, because it won't work and I'll get hurt because I have been hurt every other time". Unless ya leap you don't get rewarded with a fucking awesome that sometimes comes with a little side dish of bad- but once you have had a fucking awesome, you just want more of it, so the bad becomes easier to tolerate. Constitution gets stronger, human gets more prepared and focus is driven on the benefit not the fallout. 'Tackling Life 101' through the metaphor of eating from a dodgy street vendor- delivered by Captain Moxie hot and steaming- eesh lol 'av a laugh, it's not like we get out of life alive!
Now is explained and organised by now- not yester-hour, day, or year. What history has recorded is to learn from, be that as it may, it is only the publicised view of the particular power of the period. Egypt: incredible superpower in it's time- but Tutankhamen may have been a replica of a USA presidential candidate member for all we know. We have no idea what records of amazing events and discoveries were destroyed or controlled by authorities that had more influence. Imagine living in the future and defining and directing events working from our current media situation. Salacious, all the 'its's and 'ism's, bigoted, twisted, distorted; and not what a great proportion of intelligent minds of our time agree with- incredibly dangerous stuff. It's the kid at school who couldn't play Chinese whispers nicely and was too craven to be sincere.
I recently watched Michelle Obama being driven around the Oval Office grounds in a car pool situation with a celebrity singing to pop hits like Beyonce and Missy Elliot, when Boom, Missy appears in the back seat. Three quarters of my friends were adamant she was in the car and it was real, until I pointed out the very faint differences of colour gradient in the back window, the green screen residue cut-out of the superimposing of images together, and the fact that Michelle and her movements were never seen in the same shot- i.e. it was an actresses hand that had been inserted. How easy it is for a person's truth to be constructed, and what's the collateral? If it has importance to them and their journey, does it matter if it is real or manufactured? Needing to think that Missy and Obama were in the same car together may have relevance to propelling a person to do something extraordinary further down the line.
In the same situation, Michelle had just talked about how she was off on a tour of the Middle East promoting education of women and unobstructed access to information. So, encouraging a different culture to conform to a another's without regard to the social construct of female/ male relations and roles?... And because educating everyone is all fantastic right? Because there aren't elements of doing that that make another a rebel and revolutionary (to their partners, their families, their community)... but hold on, so this informed and aware Libyan woman is now thinking and digesting incredible (uncensored?) information and doesn't agree with or take interest in the prepackaged stuff she comes across and seeks her own truth for her own culture... Oh, right, now she has become a terrorist.
When I travel I am no longer a New Zealander, I consciously attempt to leave my preconceived notions in one corner of myself while I absorb, assimilate and acquire things which are radically different and opposite to who and what I 'am'. I am changing, but I'm not requiring others to do so. New culture, new religion, new location, new rules, new role; scrub the pre-existing format. This behaviour is the action of what everyone demands, yet seem unaware of how to procure; why would someone give respect if it is not shown in kind? We talk of 'globalisation' and of 'free sharing', yet those who are in positions of authority proclaiming liberty are not the fair children from the sandpit who shared their time and talk, toys & sandwich with their dark skinned Muslim friend from Asia. Peoples' people are much easier to find, try your bartender, your shop assistant, your nurse and those at the frontline of service. Globalisation starts with interaction; it starts with sharing that peanut and jam, and I am proud to say NZ, you are well on the path with this as a truly multicultural, celebratory and inclusive society, but on a global scale, ooph I shudder. Globalisation? Ya want the resources but not the problems? The wheel of fortune has never liked veracity and propaganda comes in the most silky of packages.
As of this week I have pushed through a rather nuggety patch for a little while at least. I have come to understand a game plan much better and the equations of what propel me to undertake different behaviours and new actions which have beneficial outcomes. I have made space within myself for improved and alternative information and continued working forwards, helping others in the process. I am immensely grateful for where I am, what I have and that I am me. Now it’s time for the next passage, enough naval gazing, yer, completely inherent to this cycle but all within balance and in it’s own time.
Right, brain, who feels like a game of ball bingo?!
☯
...
Each morning
I knit the chasms as best
I can manage
Slip stitch over rivers of
pain
sadness and self loathing
Rushing torrents with
Rapids
Crashing and raging below by the evening
At torrential full current
relentless hours of navigating boulders, hidden branches and debris
I go under
and pop back up
Weak, limp and battered
I pull myself to the cliff top
Night a gamble of refuge or ambush
The New Day
Gratified with the sun beating on my face
a
moments
reprieve
Head bowed with relief, respect and regard
Experience does nothing to harden me
by breaking me
as I crouch damp and dripping;
Some mornings
I never completely dry
My heart seeping as I leap from the cliff arms extended with defiance
Cat and mouse that torrent plays with me
And one day I will not resurface
But what she does not realise
That every crack becoming me
the shatters and shards
Fragment into less human
More water
Open weave
Refracting light
NEW ARTWORK & Donkey Kong Life
SNEEK PEEK of new work - 'Brainstorm', 2016, 400 x 560mm
Details & scale
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I.D.E.A.S & C.R.E.A.T.I.V.I.T.Y
Thought totally intrigues me. I complete continuous quality control assessments and am alllwaaays testing out the theories for a better option on mine- challenging customer! It's like I do a mental stocktake of what I think is true and what I think false, and anything that falls into the latter category is pulled out into the air and held up to the light to see whether it is substantial and can stay, or is flimsy and needs to be fixed, replaced or disposed of.
Our minds can heal or hurt us, and sometimes the 'care' signals of mine get a little lost in translation. I have complications and pretty awful pain in my lower lumbar due to fracturing vertebrae in my early twenties and a genetic condition, but only recently became aware of how I was hurting the area MORE by trying to protect it. I am super active and while out for my afternoon walk one day, I noticed how I was clenching my tummy muscles, and more so when walking down steep hills and how this was a direct relation to where the pain and discomfort was becoming worse. In short my worry and focus on that particular area was sending all the 'fight' signals to those sensitive muscles to jam up, and in the process get jared and jolted more because they were activated.
In another instance, I have been teaching myself to breathe on the left (or more unnatural) side while swimming freestyle. If I focused on breath, I would panic and think I didn't have enough air; to fix this I found if I focused on the bubbles I blew out before this my mind went into play rather than panic mode. If I sought looking for the ceiling behind me after the bubbles, it ironed out not turing my head up enough; if I tuned into the pull and follow through from the bottom left hand on stroke it brought me lift and stopped me feeling like I was sinking or bowed. Needing a bit more ooph came form remembering my feet and 'sparkling' through my fingertips and toes; straightening out my 'body plank' I had in my minds eye.
Careful dismissing the punk's opinion next to you; our generation of Einsteins aren't old men with wild hair
Self awareness, breath, meditation, the sports I love: motorbiking and snowboarding have all honed my awareness of mind play and how this effects my actions and psyche. It is ground zero for how I take on new skills and everyone can learn how to do it- the main component is tuning into something we do totally automatically: breathing followed by looking at the remedy not the problem; stand outside of yourself and look at the picture from another angle. The cool thing is, once you see the pattern and start playing with it, it effects EVERY single part of your life- from riding a bicycle handsfree and standing on one leg with eyes closed, to relationships and making things.
Anyone else noticed?- Kiwi's are hungry. Hungry for money, hungry for recognition, hungry for opportunity. Simmering under all of this is fear. People are scared to say what they think, be proud of what they have earned and achieved or draw a line in the sand over their value because social opinion and ruthless competition will pass them over or move them on. Then add a dash of self entitlement and the ‘yeah nah’, ‘I know so and so who can do it for 1/2 that or in exchange for..’; It is no wonder talent flys away when there is no incentive of worth to remain. Loyalty, gratitude and respect for professional accumulation of skill is few and farther between. Some people would sell their grandmother to get a leg up- some of them have to because they’re so far in a rock and hard place to live there is no other perceivable way.. or so they seem to think.. the ol’ ‘well that’s how it works, and that’s what ya gotta do’ excuse. Taking an alternative route to get the best result requires timing and courage- hold on down the rabbit hole! Most people achieve great things by working extremely hard over many many years to do what they do and there are always different options. Fantastic stories come from harnessing thought, honing the actions required in correlation with this, while being a valuable and positively engaged member of society. Choice: Team Darth or Team Luke.
I remember being told by a man who supported the arts, ‘You need to get off taking the moralistic high ground, because that attitude wont get you anywhere in this world’- well, I can sleep at night and ya know what- at the end of the day, THAT IS what defines me (the morals not the sleep)- and through this, what makes my art mine. Yes, I have a very strong sense of conscience, to follow Truth and trust my instincts and be guided by integrity- but I'm not up my ass about it or expecting others to feel the same. Art is opinion, emotion, what touches our core, what is provocative, what makes us think and question ourselves and our world. It doesn’t have to be agreeable, palatable or fit in a box either, and neither do I. Mother fucking snakes on a plane. You can choose your flight but not your snakes eh, thankfully in life we're not stuck on the plane permanently and have a lot of adventure and learning in-between our next flights!
In one of the most individualistic nations in the world, ironically the hardest thing is to be yourself.
Our society is becoming less democratic and much more authoritarian and directive. Home by 3am, don't smoke (excuse me, but perhaps the bigger problem is alcohol?! what about taxing that huh?!- you hit the sugar and messy birds with one stone there ya know, very few people get their lights punched out over a fag..), achieve this (but don't really because that’s rather intimidating), don't drink in parks or walk your dog between these times, use only this much of this, look, buy and wear this to be in… it’s so inteeeeeeenseee! Loosen up and relax and e.n.j.o.y. l.i.f.e perhaps without all the goddamn rules?!.. and people wonder why anxiety, low self worth and esteem is prevalent and suicide rates are high? Get off the high horse snobbery.
Humans need stuff to do to try and find coping mechanisms, when the cost of living is so goddamn high and everything is being labeled with opinions it becomes very hard to try and find a place on any type of even ground. Easy for those at the top to say do this, be this, take this, but often they are touting to a demographic that has less options, more problems, less positive reinforcement and sometimes less internal strategies encouraging strong and opposing decisions to their actual situation. Desperation does not think laterally and people feel they can't afford hope which is really fucking scary because thats a nuggety issue in a whole bigger terrifying format. NZ could really do with looking at Japan for similarities rather than UK- especially when it comes to integrating technology into society and keeping necessary practical jobs which directly influences low socio-demographic sectors and being able to have an affordable quality of life. A little shocked at that last bit? Yes, rent and some other things are high, but living, enjoying what it is to be human, in comparison to earnings- the yen stretches much much further.
Nowhere else I have travelled feels and behaves to the extreme like this. Our islands have a nasty case of small-man-syndrome. The more restrictions in place, the more people want to bend them consciously or unconsciously, and the less they work, because most peoples brains f.o.c.u.s on the restriction and not the opposite. You start to get the feeling you just can't ever get things right.. Focus on speeding and people do it more because they are subconsciously aiming on a target; make people bundle up in layers of safety gear and they think they are warrior Ghostbusters. Drivers behaviour towards the chick on the lemon bicycle with no helmet is much more wary and cautious than what they do if you are wearing a helmet (Europeans: our road user food chain is very different to you guys) Not that I rely on that- I act if everyone hasn't seen me and is going to do something irrational. Shut everything at 3am, there’s more binge drinking now than ever as people squeeze it in before closing instead of having time to boogie it off and relax, even diet- go on and on about how bad something is and the more you want it because you can SEE it in your head and you desire it MORE. With all these rigid conformities floating around I can see why people get picky at others who think for themselves, question parameters and live to their guidelines and ideals- because that is highly not encouraged… unless it brings you media recognition, when at that point- ‘CLAIM!- She/ he is a NZ’dr!’
Where once a great proportion of society would not have been exposed to the detrimental effects of an addictive behaviour, now we have not only supplied, but encouraged tapping in to an external pacifier. These can be tools to feed our brains with information for our journey if used constructively, but I wonder if people are aware or care about what too much of this drift into candy floss is doing to their thoughts and subsequently their actions and abilities to achieve goals. I foresee major social problems to arise; greater feelings of loneliness and isolation due to not honing skills of communication and interaction, mistrust of instinct and a dismissive attitude to cultivating sensory perception. An increase in feelings of having to bow to taking not quite the right path because of perceived avenues and shortcuts bringing goals; most of that flicking and swiping is not feeding information, it is passively passing through on a not so soaked up psychological level where insufficiencies rather than abundance is highlighted. I don't see that as a 100% fantastic thing- we all need to blank out for bits, but by training the brain to keep this in balance, we can encourage space for growth not stagnation. Encouragement to feed the mind with information that has relationships and focus upon goals and aspirations is essential. Learning how to deal with, manage, remove the stigma's associated and understand compulsive and addictive behaviour will be crucial for coming generations. But those apps, and that tech- man, it can be supremely beneficial if used in the right manner also, it's just that swing is dramatic and entirely up to the individual. Those of us out doing amazing things aren't watching what others are up to- we are focused on our lives and actions. Ya want superpowers?!- put down the gadgets, organise your thoughts and feelings, and tune inside and around.
Hard working New Zealander's getting on without staking a claim to a particular demographic are in some ways at a disadvantage to opportunity. Fit in a box and you are quantifiable, allocatable and bankable. Do otherwise and you can become a little snuggled up next to 'threat' territory. Brains like negative, and its very, very easy to dislike what ya don't understand.
Ego: it's a bloody interesting conundrum. Who and what I am as an artist; my work all an expression of opinion, is ego tied up in brown paper and ribbon. Or is it? Is Alexandra Murcott my ego and Moena Moxham an expression of my soul? I don't make for commerce- I make to nourish my imagination. These interesting thoughts add fuel to my enquiry of the world; they are also why I partake in sports and unusual methods of travel which require high consequential snap decisions made on realising where soul and ego are in orbit. These activities also help remove anxiety and jitters- Thought + action without overthinking because there is less space for pondering things; it's not advised to overthink doing a u-turn on a motorbike- ya look where you want to go, commit and power into it- same with my art- I make marks without apprehension- life does mighty well with the same dash of devotion to the cause. Something which can be quite easy to roll with when travelling but much more complex when back in our home surroundings with people we love and whose opinions and projections can tug us off path or undermine our security in the decisions we have chosen. I crave being out of my comfort zone, because I am intrigued about why I am there, why I behave a certain way and think it is ok, and how at a much quicker fluid pace I can trust my instincts. Plus I love rattling the cage by being uber curious as to what happens if I shake it all up.
As a community however, the way I see it, when pinnacle-ised existences, idolised individualism, media exposure as confirmation of achievement and cash-cash-money-money is prioritised we build exactly the environment we have fostered- below the gloss, and behind all the easy-going laid-back exterior it fizzes with envy, jealously and resentment. URG- look up, at and around at the paradise we inhabit and validate the bloody cool shit we have going on- as a team we need to learn better how to graciously give credit where credit is due and stop being so nit-picky. Reality is though, that the only person at the end of the day that will give you true recognition is yourself and your concept of something bigger. We control within ourselves how we want to behave with information and what we project and impose on others.
We need a reset; a wake up call, because this attitude is really, really ugly, completely pointless and counterproductive- I just hope it doesn't come to a natural disaster to do this.
On a lighter note: Here are a few other things I have learnt that keep me sane and on track when I am in the maze, may they help out when times are squiggly =^+^=
...........................................................
Love defines and drives everything. Her and Hate are one and the same, but Love has magic fizz that inevitably triumphs.
Be your hero. I strive to be the person I most admire by learning from the best.
Have the heart of a child but the wisdom of Grandma(pa).
I am a woman, whole, beautiful and wonderful as is. We give birth to the whole world- it is my responsibility to evolve and make good choices to become the best woman I can be.
We are all kooky and have baggage. Life's about learning to carry it without looking for a porter- inside knows the answers; sometimes this requires patience.
No-one else is creating my story, fixing my problems or will bring me the things I desire but moi. I answer to myself and my understanding of Universal power. I listen to everything.
I require validation from no-one or anything other than myself and my concept of something bigger than me.
My achievement is getting out of bed. Progression is getting out the front door.
Doesn't fit with the mainstream = good omen.
If you clinically evaluate the qualities of Creativity, all assessments will lead to insanity. Love the squiggly lines and care for those who share these traits.
I strive to be consistent and accumulative. The tortoise wins the race and the race of life is loooooog. Have courage and be kind.
I am fully responsible and deserve the whole package of what comes to me as the response to my decisions, behaviour and actions. What we dream; what we think, coupled with action becomes our reality.
The Maze: Artistic efficiency and creative process
Heart for direction, brain for nutting out the details.
Money is a resource not a god.
I assimilate with what makes my heart sing; there is no 'right' or 'wrong'. The faerie tales, the scriptures; the movies and stories we create and pass down through generations the world around are born from truth. Communication is the most powerful form of creation.
I am selective with what I choose to invest my time. I primarily prefer not to invest my energy into passive or unengaged activities. I'd rather be engrossed in a real relationship and cultivate the arts of engagement and communication. Tech inevitably becomes obsolete; humans don't!- instead of looking down feeding into that screen I'd rather be looking up and around in a totally different environment. Take out this stuff from your brain and it lets light and space in for muuuuch bigger concepts. Your thoughts & feelings are creating your world. Brain-fart space can still be productive :P
I believe our energy is a component of a much bigger and complex system. Through choice we can work with or against these forces. Managing ego is human job number 1 -without that in balance, it blocks all the wondrous qualities like humility, compassion, empathy, love and acceptance.
There is always someone better than me- I just get on with whatever my teeth are sunk into and if it is making me happy, brings satisfaction and contentment, and I'm not hurting others, then I have located Donkey Kong level 9. I enjoy the success of others, it spreads warm fuzzies.
Breath- it's the answer to everything.
Humans are all weird, we surround ourselves with the weirdness we can handle and tolerate and collect our own kind. I don't get pissed if something is annoying- it's a reflection of my psyche.
Everything makes ripples, and ripples collect to waves.
I strive to be satisfied and to make do with what I have, the hand I am playing and the resources I presently have available. I am grateful but I am not complacent.
Western world, society and perspective- we are a minority. Millions of people focus on trust, love, faith in something bigger than self, and enjoying existing without calculating each other as our society does- get on a plane to Asia if you don't believe me/ need to reset your existence.
We can choose love for what is wonderful or be dismissive and disgruntled for the minority that isn't.
There will always be fantasists and extremists. The more airtime given, the more power it holds. I focus on the remedies, not problems and I look for gaps. (165 kiwis died overseas last year- 0 to terrorism)
Stop watching the media, it's bullshit.
Easy goes through hard, and no-one has 'easy' all the time. I don't wish life was easier, I seek better skills and more knowledge to work within it. I completely trust my intuition.
My perspective and way of thinking has been moulded over experience for my journey and to shape and support the direction I have chosen. I respect how and why someone thinks or behaves differently because it is pertinent for who they are and where they are going. We need to think and believe in different things in order to carry out the activities and journeys we are on. Personally, I am quite happy to consider and explore options and viewpoints different to my own, even when they are personally confronting. I have learnt from testing this procedure that often I prefer the new concept or want to assimilate a component into my existing framework; I really enjoy this process. Often, worldwide, we are talking about the same things, only with different names.
My thoughts or ideas might not be 'correct' at the time, but they may be necessary to lead me onto something else or a bigger concept. I'm happy to test things out and put up my hand when I've fucked up or got something wrong- oops soz. I don't judge others for their kookiness or blips, life's a process not a collection of commodities.
I'm not going anywhere until my soul completes what it is driving me to experience and help with.
Our gifts are balanced by our individual challenges. Whatever we have been blessed with means we are going to be working through a whole different pile of nobblies.
Beautiful humans don't hatch out of an egg that way, we evolve and grow. The most powerful propulsion to wanting to be better, is often being at that point the complete opposite. We as a world now have access to every imaginable tool and piece of information to up-skill and feed our brains; watch how the world will change: 'third world' souls + desire + propulsion for change + the burn of feeling marginalised + grateful recognition of opportunity + tenacity = revolution. It is the most desperate that have the potential to become the most powerful if they so choose.
Change is the only constant; from mindset to actions, to trends, relationships and the environment. I am baffled how human arrogance sticks to rigid systems. Like why would we think our climate wouldn't evolve like we do- there are more of us than ever doing and using things like never before? That the seasons would stick to a calendar that we wrote over Nature; that once what was 'right' forever is? We can confirm planets with habitable atmospheres and know the image we have received is squillion years old, and yet people can be adamant we are 'the one'...umm shit can get furry reaaalll quiiick- it don't take 100's of years; whats grown in the meantime?!.. + we are built to explore, not stay on ship. I wonder what is looking at us (I'd be hiding too). Human evolution theory doesn't equate for the development of consciousness- fixated on the outside?, perhaps this virus is the alien? Perhaps we are 'infecting' each other with more of this? The media goes on and on about using resources and doesnt focus on the fact we make and discover new ones. Humming on about the negative doesn't fix it, it actually just makes more of it- enjoy the positive aspect (yes, we are allowed to) and get in and actively affect what tugs our personal story and abilities. Yep, things are different, but there are great things about this too; the climate in my hometown is bloody wonderful comparably- I know, this isn't great, but we have to roll with the punches now, and a person who is angry, discontent and negative is not empowered to get moving and helping.
Change whether personal or environmental starts with a desire to want to do better and encouragement to action a good choice- we must find a way to promote more of this and less panic if we want to influence people in feeling confident to make and support new decisions. There is no question we have change within our weather and environments and this is radically and detrimentally effecting our habitat. The problem is huge- it's at global corporation level- but this is like voting- if you don't do it, you might as well hold your opinion about it, so I am active in doing my fair share. Individual humans can have an effect on mass to the supply and demand of the commodities which are produced using fossil fuels. Ya'll this is about addressing major problems with greed and complacency- gnarly and complicated knots to untangle aint they. We will look back at this time in history as The Age of Fear- it's crippling people into not moving. We have the freedom of choice to buy into this or not but this takes courage- fear doesn't empower- 99% of this is crap in wrapping when ya get up and close, personal like and inspect- plus we can only start by inspecting what hits us (nosey). Start; just start- as long as it's positive and productive it doesn't matter how small or whether anyone else is or isn't doing it. My culture is so supremely blessed with a tool that is the most valuable resource on the planet: choice- I use it.
And the biggest one: Never ever, ever, ever give up; build for your vision; our ideas are special to us and our timing. It doesn't matter what didn't work yesterday, that is not now. Now, we are 12 hours wiser and connecting the dots with that additional knowledge. We have never before attacked finding solutions with the formula we have right now; none of us have been alive right now before, which also dispels anyone pooping the party, what do they know about your dots that you don't?
...
If your interest is ticked in wanting to view a fascinating and honest doco about climate change cruise your eyeballs here.
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Inspriational with a capital In-spaaaa! ..humm,,,, gimmie a couple of months....
The Great Degustation
......................
Define
what I leave behind
Fakers create
concoctions mimicked and generated with
tricks
that paint and create with brutal clinical efficiency
a mirage
Our brains are so special
in being able to procure and
curve
like multicoloured gymnasts twirling ribbon batons
our colours of value
Ideas are Divine
Energy Infinite
The older I get the more I let go
The more I love
The words I script and stain onto paper a mark
perhaps legacy
The lines I carve on
glass
more fragile in my brain than in
reality
but that is my scratching
Physically present in a
digital vortex
Superseded by the power of
speech
in vibrant HD
I sense your complexities
can share your perspective
as you manipulate mine
talking them over
transferring their weight
caressing them through articulation between us
so the prickles
soften
Powerful invisible creations
propagate, cultivate,
pop
Stretched and morphed like
flour to dough
Change to nourishment
Share for growth
Gods in Converse
Those monsters growing in the
dark corridors of conscious
and
Ssslinking
along the skirting boards around confidence
The cleaners come through;
only naughty tykes under the hall lamp
disintegrating when
Hitting
the light
Colossus they seem when
hidden
in the fringes
seeping and shifting
morphing and moving
My badge embroidered on coveralls
ready for splatters
Master Utilities Janitor
Dressed in our best
bow ties and chiffon
OUTrageous, highly flammable,
we sit enraptured by the presentation before us
the Hall dark and long
one door in front and one behind
the Elephant
cooked to perfection
a lifetime to consume
we start one delectable
mouthful
at a time
Time has taken charge of passion
the taste is no longer appealing
and only so little
progress
we have made
flies coming to rest on the kill
Doubt and questioning buzzing with
purposeful velocity
Rising as steam from fresh slaughter
Must get the job done.
Youngans with a taste for Elephant
by osmosis
The fanfare orchestrated by the
Universal Maestra
conducting proceedings
complex and limitless
A salubrious opus
composed for a lifetime of living
Insert triangle...
now!
What is influential when all is accessible
Rocket up
explode in a shower of colour spectacularly
Coming Down
don’t you know you meet everyone twice
two directions
maybe more
Methods of perception
many more than 5
Emotional dexterity
the last bastion
of an intimate personal frontier
Palatial grounds
Elaborate keys
Make for your mind
Want to
like
the Elephant
see her tassels swing,
glossy snapshots
my Elephant prefers
privacy
Valuable modern commodity
Her bikini shots and selfies
belong
to relationships built in the
zoo
The procession of best dressed
with ties Absent With Out Leave and
knickers hitched; dresses askew
Padding barefoot and
Brave
Definition really is of no consequence
Come
Eyes to the front not behind
with virtue and steel
Pensive
Inevitable
Progression
Undoing knots with
nimble fingers
curious
mind,
authenticity
and playfulness that no automation
nor calculation
can re-create
Eat the elephant
one
mouthful
at
a
time
☮ & 💖 in The Hague, Netherlands
🙊ok- this is the CUTEST thing eva- It is a bridge purposely built for squirrels to get over the road! 🐿❤️someone knows why they want to get to the other side.. hehe Peace, love and bloody cool Dutch design. Click HERE to see the video the New York Times created on this topic and using my photo ;)
The greatest thing I will ever create is my life. I adore the world and the people within it and get great enjoyment from sharing the things and experiences I come across.
Here is some uber doozie dopeness in Holllllland ^+^
. . -- 🚗 🏍 🏎 🛩-- . .
The Louwman Museum - The Hague
The Louwman Museum is the most spectacular collection of automobiles and art, sculpture and design. It is simply exquisite. From the architecture of the building and landscape of the grounds, to the presentation, layout and flow of the museum itself. The Louwman collection is not only vast, but perfectly composed. It is obvious each and every piece has been carefully selected and adored.
Currently there is wonderful display of Willem Lenssinck sculptures displayed in the main entrance hall (which is glorious in itself!)- seriously fabulous stuff! Love LOVE!
From teeny to large what is especially wonderful is the Louwmans invested in pieces that resonated of other peoples passion and loves also. Mr Toyoda's desk, Robert Mathewson's Swan Car, one of Elvis' Cadillacs, the Suzuki raced by Wil Hartog who was the first Dutchman to win the 500cc Grand Prix at the 1977 Dutch TT. A revolutionary McLaren racing car and the DB5 Aston Martin driven by Sean Connery in the James Bond film 'Goldfinger' sit with bronze, glass and silver sculptures, paintings, posters, gas bowsers and other collectables; all exemplary members of this exclusive family. Every single item on display has been thoughtfully and lovingly selected as the pièce de résistance of it's kind- the museum exudes passion.
I live by 'quality over quantity' - but this is a very, very rare instance where quantity is of exceptional quality.
The Louwman Museum, complied by two generations of the Louwman family, is home to the world’s oldest private collection of motor cars. The museum dates back to 1934 and now comprises over two hundred and fifty antique and classic motor cars. Experts regard the collection as one of the most beautiful in the World. Each item on display has its own story to tell, its own contribution to history. The motor car is a mirror of culture. Automobiles also mirror personality; I would have very much liked Mr Louwman ;)
The collection is housed in a purpose-built museum in The Hague, the city where P.W. Louwman established his Dodge and Chrysler import company. The building, designed by American architect Michael Graves, blends in sympathetically with its historic surroundings. The landscape gardens, designed by Lodewijk Baljon, complement the architecture of the building.
From Bugatti like my Great Grandmother raced, to Jaguars my Grandfather collected and restored to Cadillacs my Uncle adores and Aston Martins which are the ultimate car in my eyes (duly noted no Morris Minor in the collection!) there is something for everyones tastes.
Blue: 1909 Gregoire 12/14-HP Coupe de Voyage and Yellow: 1910 Peugeot Type 126 12-15-HP Touring
1953 Fiat 1100 Boat-car Carrozzeria Coriasco
Elvis Presley, the ‘King of Rock ‘n’ Roll’, loved Cadillacs, and so does my uncle who is a dead ringer for the man himself. Presley owned about a hundred of them and most were customised. His purple and pink Cadillacs have since become world famous. This Fleetwood with its 8.2-litre engine was also built to his specification. Dummy headlamps were placed over the original lights, a generous amount of chrome was applied and thick running boards were fitted with a light-organ, which flashed when the car doors were opened. The dashboard lights pulsed to the beat of the music on the radio. Needless to say the interior has plush upholstery. A so-called ‘continental kit’, an extended bumper with spare wheel housing, was added to the rear. This was first applied to the Lincoln Continental, hence the name. However, on this Cadillac the housing is actually too small to take a real wheel.
Sadly, Elvis did not have long to enjoy this car. He died in August 1977, aged only 42.
1964 Aston Martin DB5
Forever linked: James Bond, Sean Connery, Aston Martin. This is the original DB5 that secret agent James Bond was given by the engineer ‘Q’ to carry out his mission in the film ‘Goldfinger’. The Aston Martin has the following gadgets:
- Two Browning machine guns behind the front indicators
- Hydraulic, extendable bumpers for use as battering-rams
- Revolving licence plates with English, Swiss and French registrations
- Extendable knives in the left rear hub to slash tyres
- A smoke dispenser to create a smokescreen
- A rear-mounted oil pump to create a slippery surface for pursuers
- A mechanism to scatter crow’s-feet on the road
- A bullet-proof screen to protect the rear window
- A navigation and radar system for tracking cars
- And, last but not least, an ejector seat to get rid of undesirable passengers
The deviser of all this lethal technology was Ken Adam, who worked on the production of the film. He was inspired by his experiences in the Royal Air Force during the Second World War, when he flew a heavily armed Hawker Typhoon. All modifications to this DB5, which is one of four (three have survived) that were fully kitted out, were made in the Aston Martin factory. The scene where the car is handed over to James Bond was filmed in a corner of that factory.
Wil Hartog (born 28 May 1948) is a Dutch former Grand Prix motorcycle road racer.
Born in in Abbekerk, North Holland, Hartog became the first Dutchman to win a 500cc Grand Prix when he claimed a victory at the 1977 Dutch TT. Hartog won five Grands Prix during his career. Standing over six feet tall, he was at a disadvantage against his jockey-sized competitors yet he still managed impressive results. With his penchant for wearing all white riding apparel, he was nicknamed the white giant.
In 1971 Peter Revson won the CanAm championship in this M8F, fitted with an 8.1-litre Chevrolet V8 engine producing almost 750 hp. His teammate Denny Hulme finished second in another M8F.
The angular, aerodynamic edges on the sides are typical of this very wide McLaren M8F, which was built for the effectively unlimited CanAm Series. It was the most significant model in a series of almost unbeatable racing cars which, in the hands of racing driver/constructor/team owner Bruce McLaren and his teammate Denny Hulme, dominated the CanAm Series at the end of the sixties. It even got to the stage where the race was referred to as ‘The Bruce and Denny Show’. Both men are New Zealanders, hence the kiwi, my countries national symbol, on the side of the car. YESSS! ^+^
In 1967, 1968 and 1969 McLaren and Hulme took turns in winning the title. However, in 1970 tragedy struck – Bruce McLaren was killed while test-driving the new prototype. In spite of these difficulties Denny Hulme managed to win the title once again.
1910 Brooke 25/30HP Swan Car
This Brooke Swan Car is truly extraordinary. It was the creation of the eccentric and wealthy Englishman Robert Nicholl ‘Scotty’ Matthewson, who lived in early 20th century Calcutta, the capital of what was then British India. Matthewson wanted to shock the local elite with his car, and he certainly succeeded in doing so.
Cygnet The Baby Swan Car 1920
The bodywork represents a swan gliding through water. The rear is decorated with a lotus flower design finished in gold leaf, an ancient symbol for divine wisdom. Apart from the normal lights, there are electric bulbs in the swan’s eyes that glow eerily in the dark. The car has an exhaust-driven, eight-tone Gabriel horn that can be operated by means of a keyboard at the back of the car. A ship’s telegraph was used to issue commands to the driver. Brushes were fitted to sweep off the elephant dung collected by the tyres. The swan’s beak is linked to the engine’s cooling system and opens wide to allow the driver to spray steam to clear a passage in the streets. Whitewash could be dumped onto the road through a valve at the back of the car to make the swan appear even more lifelike.
The car caused panic and chaos in the streets on its first outing and the police had to intervene. Matthewson sold the car to the Maharaja of Nabha, whose family owned it for over seventy years.
The car was discovered years later in its original state, albeit in poor condition. The sumptuous Indian silk upholstery had been eaten away by rats. In 1991 it came into the ownership of the Louwman Museum and was fully restored. New upholstery was commissioned from an Indian weaving mill following the discovery of remnants of the original material under the seats. All the gadgets were made to working order again. In 1993 the Swan won the Montagu Prize at the prestigious Pebble Beach Concours d’Élégance in California.
To accompany the large ‘Swan Car’ The Marahaja of Nabha had this smaller version made for use on his estate in the 1920s. The body was hand-beaten from steel sheet and fitted with an electric motor. It was called the 'Baby Swan' or 'Cygnet'. Note the cygnets at the front. This is probably the oldest Indian-made automobile.
Both cars are now reunited in the museum, like ‘mother and daughter’.
Above: muses, amazing engines, filigree cars, Art Nouveaux posters, illustrations, grills, bowsers and magnificent interior achritecture- pwwooah, if I only could show more!
1955 Daimler DK 400 'Golden Zebra' Coupe
Art or an ostentatious and vulgar display of wealth? This is the 1955 equivalent to driving a customised hot pink Porche while wearing a matching velour jumpsuit on yourself and chihuahua- hold on.. nah, that's kinda funny hot. This thing is disturbing- more like using the chihuahua to furnish the Porche. Visitors to the Earls Court Motor Show in London in 1955 must have been in dismay when they saw this Daimler on the stand of Hooper coachbuilders. Its extraordinary characteristics are golden trim, zebra-hide upholstery, an ivory (!) dashboard and a zebra mascot on the radiator. It is a disturbing relic of the mentality held by some in the 1950's towards Africa and the animal inhabitants.
Created by Lady Docker, a former nightclub dancer who married Sir Bernard Docker (the chairman of BSA, which owned the Daimler company) in 1949, after two previous millionaire-marriages. Lady Docker believed that the Daimler marque was not widely recognised and needed to do something to enhance its reputation. She took on the role of stylist and as of 1951 she commissioned Hooper to build a new and ostentatious display model every year. This was the 1955 model, which was further fitted with a cocktail bar, a picnic basket, leather cases, and ivory make-up utensils.
Eventually, the management at BSA had enough of the Dockers’ flamboyant and indulgent lifestyle, especially since England had not yet recovered from the effects of the war. Sir Bernard was removed from the board and the cars were stripped of their accessories before being sold off.
The Golden Zebra had multiple owners and was restored to its original state between 1998 and 2006. Zebra hides were imported from Kenya for the upholstery. Needless to say, the dashboard is no longer made of ivory but a combination of ivory wood and sycamore.
After the BSA affair, Sir Bernard and Lady Docker were gradually excluded from high society and lost more and more of their possessions. They spent their last days in a bungalow in Jersey as tax exiles. Good triumphs evil... thank goodness.
After winding your way through the displays, you arrive into a grand hall. Original house fronts, sourced from around The Hague create an authentic 1920's atmosphere. The houses are furnished and filled with all sorts of amazing and interesting goodies in their own right. Artisan level food is accompanied by attentive old world service- simply Deeeee-vine ^=^
Whether you are a motor enthusiast, appreciate art and design or just like to wander amongst beautiful things, this is on the top of my list of wonderful ways to spend time. Quite. Magnificent.
. . -- 🚗 🏍 🏎 🛩-- . .
The Escher Museum - The Hague
The M.C Escher collection is housed in the former Winter Palace of Queen Mother Emma of the Netherlands. The royal ambiance of the building has been maintained to the highest standard and much to my delight- incredible contemporary chandeliers are installed in the rooms.
These contemporary masterpieces by Rotterdam based artist Hans van Bentem take controversial forms; a skull, gun, shark and bomb are a few, however they mange to sublimely and seamlessly integrate modern cool into their traditional chic environment.
The museum on the far right and Hotel Des Indes in yellow.
Maurits Cornelis Escher (1898-1972) is one of the world's most famous graphic artists. He was born in Leeuwarden, the Netherlands, as the fourth and youngest son of a civil engineer and had a privileged and culturally rich childhood.
He is most famous for his so-called 'impossible constructions' and optical illusion drawings. What most are not so aquatinted with are his wonderful, more realistic works created during the time he lived and traveled in Italy.
The surroundings are rather sublimely elegant huh! Below: Escher's early works and sketches were of particular interest to me
M.C. Escher was a prolific artist. During his lifetime he made 448 lithographs, woodcuts and wood engravings and over 2000 drawings and sketches. Like some of his famous predecessors, Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Dürer and Holbein, M.C. Escher was left-handed. Escher was not only a graphic artist, but also illustrated books, designed tapestries, postage stamps and murals.
Following are some of my favourite Escher works ^=^
Circle Limit IV, 1960, Woodcut in black and ocre, printed from 2 blocks.
Drawing Hands, 1948, Lithograph. 332mm x 282mm.
Puddle, 1952, Woodcut in black, green and brown, printed from 3 blocks. 319mm x 240mm.
Eye, 1946, Mezzotint, 7th and final stage.
Dewdrop, 1948, Mezzotint. 245mm x 179mm.
👣 👀 🏛 🌌 🔮 🎨🕴
Himeji, Mt Shosha, Aminohashidate... & a FARKIN rad Photographer by the name of SEAN AICKIN
Move over Kyoto and Osaka, this blog is dedicated to the bright stars of the central and lower third of Honshu.... and one burning bright with the flash ON in Wellington, NZ.
For a map of my travels click HERE. A fraction is taged, but it's still an interesting geez- growing up with a Da who has instilled in me the beauty, functionality and wonder of maps- it's nice to know where you have been and where you are going- better get on and tag past the moon then too hehe
¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º° ≥^.^≤ °º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸
HIMEJI CASTLE & Mt SHOSHA- 円教寺, Engyōji Temples
Himeji Castle is a UNESCO World heritage site and has only just reopened on the 27th of March 2015 after extensive reconstruction. What was especially remarkable about this is that this was done using completely traditional methods. It is the largest castle in Japan and is featured in many films and movies. It is truly spectacular to visit and I was fascinated by the displays and information regarding the constructions and conservation- there are even videos you can watch on your iPhone when you go past certain media sites!
Often in Japan you find old sites or building have 'burnt' down and been reconstructed. The Japanese are meticulous in their assemblies and methodology, and in some ways this re-birth fits the Japanese mentality perfectly. This is the Land of reinvention yet protection. Like with ancient artefacts- associations, names and ideas are added or carefully assigned after long consideration and research- makes me giggle a bit if we have that toothpick as a priceless hairpin though...
The castle is surrounded by stunning Japanese Gardens (rebuild 1992) where you can take tea and sweets in a traditional Japanese tea house without feeling like you are fighting with Time and the masses.
Making Himeji Castle Anko (red bean paste) sweets. Check out this machine! Recipe for paste is HERE. You can sandwich between pikelets for a tasty Eastern twist ;)
Himeji City Museum of Art- currently superb Marc Chagall
Himeji as a city is eaaaasy going, has fantastic food and great creative sites to see in the city and surrounding area. I went up into the surrounding hills for a day to feed my love for getting out of the hustle and bustle and had a stunning experience at the Engyoji Temples where you can wander around the over 1000 year old places of worship with the birds, the talking trees and the stones that listen.
Amazing examples of Oshi-e or Kurumie (padded and layered pictures)
At the bottom of the ropeway at Mt Shosha is an INCREDIBLE (can I highlight this even further?!) museum called 'Shosha-no-sato Art and Craft Center' at the foot of the mountain. You will find artwork done by Kosho Shimizu who was born in Himeji and became the chief priest at the Todaiji Temple in Nara. His work is diverse, expressive, colourful and across many mediums (ceramic, paint, embossings and calligraphy- GO DUDE- & he had a wicked sense of humour).
You can also observe or participate in making traditional Himeji crafts such as leather products, spinning tops, masks, Kurumie and Himeyama dolls.
Kosho Shimizu
¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º° ≥^.^≤ °º¤ø,¸¸,ø¤º°`°º¤ø,¸
AMINOHASHIDATE - Singing Sands Beach
Like a little Venice and Noosa wrapped into one with Oysters the specialty (BIG ones- like the SIZE OF MY FIST AND CUT INTO 5!!) and Fugu, the super poisonous Japanese puffer fish.
The water was warm, the sun hot, the sand sings(!), the food tasty and the vibe super chill- I could live here easily. You get a special travel ticket when you change onto the last train to get here that gives you free access around the area for two or so days too- boom! But trust me, as soon as you step off the train, it just smells and feels right- you are not going to be a rushin' :)
(⊙.⊙(☉_☉)⊙.⊙) - ⊙ ☉ ☉ ⊙ - (⊙.⊙(☉_☉)⊙.⊙)
One of my closest buddies, and phenomenal photographer Sean Aickin has just got his website up and for the world to see! FIND HIM...and buy him a beer when you do ;) x
His BLOG is here too (which for the record is seanaikinsux - he don't - he's megga un-sux-ing lol)
Upcoming Awesome Events- Splore and Flowstate
There is still time to grab your tent, snatch the 'kini or the budgie smugglers and get on the road! .... better add that Care Bear Onsie in too ;D
Click to go explore SPLORE!
There are art installations, workshops, performances and moooooreee!!......
EPIC line up- click the image to go see what other amazing acts are coming!
Miss Kara-Leah Grant from theyogalunchbox.co.nz is taking two workshop not to miss too!
POST SPLORE: Verdict: THE BEST FESTIVAL I Hhave been to to date- Hands down. Absolutely wonderfully chilled and fun- with a capital F. The venue, the facilities, the vibe and the ethos- sustainable, leaving no trace and an experience I will treasure. I haven't EVER been as relaxed or enjoyed a camping music festival like I have the last three days. It is truly a family friendly festival and completely unique. This biennial event has now gone annual- If you are in NZ, I would lock and load now for next year!
BURNING MAN YEEEEAAH!
I am now eyeing up these two phenomenons- CLICK on the images to go have a peek *=^
Mind + Body + Adventure.... +++ ^=^
I don't think I can quite express how excited I am to be joining these guys for the week... well, put it this way- I am SO excited I am q u i e t .... (and if you know me- you will truly understand the significance of that statement!)
Get thee to their site and check out the other events and adventures they have coming up!!
YES YES YES!
𝒞𝓊𝓇𝓇𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓁𝓎 𝓁𝑜𝒸𝒶𝓉𝑒𝒹 𝒾𝓃:
𝓙𝓪𝓹𝓪𝓷 | 2014
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